Nightmares
by LOTSloverCSS
Summary: Richard, Kahlan, and Cara's nightmares come to life.
1. Chapter 1

**Title: **Nightmares

**Author: **LOTSlover

**Characters: **Richard / Kahlan / Zedd / Cara

**Rating: **PG – 16 / T

**Timeline: **Sequel to my story Linked

**Story Type: **Angst / Romance / Adventure

**Spoilers:** Anything from Season 1 and Season 2 up through Torn

**Disclaimer:** I love them and love to write about them even though I don't own them or make a dime.

**Summary: **Richard, Kahlan, and Cara's worst nightmares come to life.

**Nightmares**** (Chapter 1)**

The air was crisp with the gentle wind that began with sundown, making the forest come alive even though it was growing ever darker by the moment. Fireflies began to flicker and glow, adding their own bit of magic to the night. The fire crackled and hissed as Cara added more twigs to it, causing a large puff of smoke to billow up and disappear into the air.

"Zedd, really I'm fine," Kahlan insisted as he cleaned the wound on her forehead.

"My dear that gash on your head is not fine. Once my powers regenerate, then it will be fine, but until that moment I need to take care of it. Besides, Richard will be most upset with me if I don't take proper care of you," Zedd reminded her.

"I can handle Richard, Zedd," she smiled broadly.

"Handle me how?" Richard asked as he entered their camp, dead rabbits in hand for dinner and a troubled look upon his face.

"Richard, I'm fine. Zedd, you don't need to…"

"How's her head?" Richard interrupted, ignoring her insistence as he leaned over to place the rabbits by the fire as he watched Zedd tend to Kahlan's wound.

"It's pretty deep; I won't be able to heal her until my powers are restored in the morning," Zedd replied with a sigh.

"Why don't you rest, Zedd. I'll take care of Kahlan," Richard stated as he walked to stand by her side.

"I'll help Cara with dinner; I'm starved after fighting off all those banelings," Zedd responded as he stood to his feet and walked to the other side of camp to help Cara with the rabbits.

"You're always starved, Wizard," Cara rolled her eyes in agitation.

Sitting down beside his Confessor, Richard poured water onto the cloth before continuing to clean the wound. His usual loving brown eyes were distant and filled with worry, brow furrowed deep in thought.

Today's attack on Kahlan was weighing heavily on his mind. While Richard and Cara had been hunting and Zedd was setting up camp, Kahlan had gone into town to restock some of their supplies. On her way back to camp, a large group of D'Haran banelings had followed her until she was out of town and then attacked her. Thankfully, they had heard her screams and ran to her rescue to find her outnumbered twenty to one.

Once the attack was crushed, Richard had swiftly pulled her into a frantic embrace. Since releasing her from his hold, he had kept his distance, staring at her at times but not talking to her or touching her.

"Richard, I'm fine…really," Kahlan softly said as she laid her hand on his leg, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

"Kahlan, you're not fine," he emphatically stated, trying to ignore the feel of her hand upon his thigh that was causing him to flush with warm desire. Fighting the urge to take her right there, he angrily responded, "Hold still."

Her touch was thrilling, an addiction he never wanted to be cured of. But right now, Richard was too upset to think about how he wanted to feel her in his arms, how desperately he wanted to make love to her. His heart began to pound in his chest at the images that lingered in his head. Images of her lying on the ground, blood oozing from her head, banelings standing over her ready to take her life; images that he knew would haunt his dreams for many nights to come.

Richard could barely contain his anger and fear. It wasn't Kahlan's fault that she had been attacked, but why had she gone off into town by herself. He swallowed hard at the anger that swarmed in his soul and threatened to choke the life out of him. He knew they couldn't keep going like they were, not with the Keeper throwing everything he had at them. Richard knew he was going to have to do something to keep her safe if he didn't want to lose her forever.

Seeing the terror that mirrored in his eyes, Kahlan placed her hand on his cheek. "Hey…Richard…look at me," she pleaded.

With a sigh, Richard turned his focus from the gash on her head to her electric blue eyes that shined with love. When he looked into those eyes, the worries and fears that possessed his heart seemed to just dissolve into nothingness, telling him that there was nothing they could not survive together. Somehow, though, he feared this time it wouldn't be enough.

Trying not to lose his resolve, Richard quietly said, "Kahlan, we need to talk…alone."

"Okay," she tentatively replied.

"Are you alright to walk with me?"

"My head still aches, but I'm alright," she answered taking his offered hand as he stood to his feet.

Clutching her hand tightly in his, Richard began to lead her out of the camp. "We're going for a walk; we'll be back in a little bit. Go ahead and start eating without us," he called over his shoulder.

"Well, hurry back. There's no guarantee there will be any food left with Zedd here," Cara answered, not liking the idea of them walking off by themselves, but knowing enough not to argue.

XXX

"Richard, what's wrong?" Kahlan finally broke the awkward silence that hung between them.

Coming to a stop, Richard pulled her to sit down beside him on a fallen tree. Looking up, Richard stared at the countless stars flickering brightly overhead, trying to find his words. How was he going to be able to tell her that he needed to send her away?

"Richard, you're starting to scare me; please talk to me," she whispered, anxiety escalating rapidly.

"Kahlan, I'm taking you back to Aydindril; it's not safe out here with me anymore," he rushed in one breath for fear of never being able to say the words that tore at his heart.

The thought of sending her away was killing him after all that they had been through together, especially after having their minds linked. He never wanted to be apart from her again. He had been adamant about her staying with him no matter what…but now all that had changed. Seeing her lying on the ground bleeding had almost pushed him over the edge.

"You can't be serious, Richard," she murmured, startled by his words, eyes wide in shock.

"You were right before in trying to leave. It's not safe for you, Kahlan. I know that now. I thought I could protect you, but I obviously can't," he heatedly explained, his emotions brewing just below the surface, ready to erupt at any moment.

"No, Richard, I was wrong. We're stronger together than we are apart. You made me see that," she replied as she touched his cheek and stared into his eyes.

Reaching up and grasping her hand, Richard pulled it down holding her hand in his lap. He couldn't hold onto his resolve with her hand touching his face. He had to be strong if Kahlan was going to survive.

"Kahlan, you left before in order to protect me, but I want you to leave now for your own safety. I can't bear to watch you get injured anymore and I definitely won't stand by and watch you die on me. That is why I am taking you to Aydindril. Zedd can stay there to make sure the wizards and the palace army protect you. Cara and I will continue the search for the stone. As soon as the rift is sealed, I will meet you in Aydindril. We can get married and…"

"You've got this all planned out, don't you?" Kahlan angrily stated as she stood to her feet and began pacing in front of him, arms crossed tightly over her chest in a desperate attempt to hold her heart together. "Do I even get a say in any of this?"

"Kahlan, it's for your own good, to keep you alive. I promise I will come back to you just as soon…"

"No! I'm not going to Aydindril, Richard. I can't stand the thought of being separated from you again. Besides, the Seeker needs his Confessor. It's my duty as your Confessor to protect you on your quest, Richard."

"Am I just your duty?!" he heatedly exclaimed as he jumped to his feet, no longer able to control the emotions that were creating a storm in his soul.

"You know you're not just my duty. You know I love you more than my life, but you can't just make decisions for me without discussing it with me. We're a team, Richard. You said that no matter what we would handle everything together," she cried, unable to contain her own hurt and anger.

"Was it a 'team' decision for you to go into town by yourself?!" he yelled, his emotions getting the better of him, his chest heaving with the weight of his fears.

"Richard, I'm not completely helpless. I can take care of myself!" she spat out, her eyes glowing with anger.

"Obviously not or I wouldn't have found you on the ground bleeding to death about to be killed!" he yelled back, moving to stand in front her. All his hurts and fears were spewing uncontrollably out of him like hot lava. He knew he was hurting her, but he couldn't seem to stop himself; the horror of losing her was gripping his soul and swallowing him whole.

"I took care of myself long before I met you!" she hissed. Her breathing ragged with anger and hurt, Kahlan started to move around him to walk back to camp, afraid she was going to say something she would later regret.

Richard quickly moved in front of her, grabbing her arms to make her stay and talk to him. He had to make her realize he was only doing this to protect her. Seeing the smoldering anger in her eyes, he tried to bring his own temper under control.

"Kahlan, I can't lose," he heatedly exclaimed, desperate for her to understand, to see why he was doing this.

"No, but you've already decided to send me away instead. I am the Mother Confessor. No one tells me what to do, Richard…not even you!" she said in a deadly low whisper, laced with hurt as she jerked her arms free from his grasp and marched away from him, leaving him standing alone.

Running his hands through his hair, Richard released an angry cry that permeated the calm sanctuary of the woods. Turning, he slammed his fist into the nearest tree trunk, incensed that he had just hurt the woman he loved. Couldn't she see that it was destroying him to send her back to Aydindril and go on without her, that he couldn't live with himself if something happened to her?

Richard hung his head in frustrated anger as he held his throbbing hand. Everything inside of him was screaming at him to chase after her and make her see that it was only because he loved her so much, but he knew that they both just needed to calm down. Maybe in the morning after getting some sleep, Kahlan would be more open to his decision.

XXX

Richard sat alone on the fallen tree for some time, gently swinging his legs as he stared at the stars overhead. His mind kept replaying the argument he had with Kahlan; his heart ached so badly he felt as if he could barely breathe. He couldn't believe he had lost his temper with her. The fear of losing Kahlan consumed his thoughts and haunted his dreams. He honestly thought that he was doing what was best for her, putting her safety above his own happiness.

Finally making his way back to camp, Richard mulled over the decision he had made. He only wanted her to be safe, not out in the open with him where she was an easy target. He knew it would be painful to be separated again, but he thought Kahlan would have been happy to return to Aydindril and begin planning their wedding for when he returned.

A small smile crept across his lips at the thought of marrying Kahlan. It caused his heart to flutter with happiness at the thought of seeing her walking down the aisle towards him, of making Kahlan his for all eternity. Images of Kahlan in her wedding dress, of making love to her on their wedding night in her bed began forming in Richard's mind, temporarily pushing aside the heartache that had been consuming him. It felt like an eternity away; that day could not come soon enough for him.

As he entered the clearing, Richard noticed Kahlan on the far end of the campsite. She was already asleep on her bedroll, her blanket draped over her. Zedd and Cara were just finishing eating their dinner as Richard approached them.

"Did Kahlan eat already?" Richard softly inquired, sorrow piercing his heart at the site of her all alone, far away from where he had laid out his things.

"She said she was tired and didn't want anything to eat," Zedd quietly informed his grandson.

"Did she let you check her wound?" his eyes narrowing with concern, feeling guilty for letting Kahlan return to camp by herself.

"No, she went straight to bed after she returned; she looked pretty exhausted," Zedd told him as he began to clean up the dishes. "Here, I saved you some dinner, my boy."

"I'm not hungry," he wearily answered as he sat down to lean his back against a tree away from Cara and Zedd.

"I'll take first watch," Cara readily volunteered, obviously anxious to escape the thick tension that hung in the air since Kahlan had returned to camp.

"No, Cara, I'll take it. I probably won't be able to sleep tonight anyway," Richard stopped her.

"I think Cara can handle the first watch, Richard. You need to rest; you look exhausted yourself. You haven't been sleeping much, have you?" Zedd asked, worry in his eyes.

Cara left to walk the perimeter before Richard could object, glad to be away from all the emotional stress that was permeating the camp. Whatever Richard had said to Kahlan, it had not been well received.

Richard leaned his head back against the tree, closing his eyes in a futile attempt to escape all the pain he felt and the hurt that he had caused Kahlan…


	2. Chapter 2

Sorry I cut it off in Chp1 where I did, but I had no other good spot to stop it! Thanks for following along everyone…

**Nightmares**** (Chapter 2)**

Leaning against the tree, his mind consumed with the argument he'd had with Kahlan, Richard felt the presence of someone dropping down to sit beside him.

Richard opened his eyes hoping it was Kahlan. Releasing a frustrated sigh, he was disappointed to see it was his grandfather. Tears began to collect in his eyes as he stared into Zedd's wrinkled face.

"Zedd, I hurt her and I don't know what to do to make it right," he softly choked out as he fought back the tears that were determined to fall despite the Seeker's best efforts. All the stress, anguish, and terror that he held in his heart suddenly began trickling down his face.

Laying his hand on his grandson's shoulder, Zedd said, "Richard there is nothing in this world that your love for each other cannot survive…even things said in the heat of the moment. Kahlan just needs a little space right now."

Covering his face with his hands, Richard mumbled, "You didn't see the look on her face when she pulled out of my hold and walked away from me. Zedd, I thought I was doing the right thing to keep her safe, but now…I don't know what to think anymore."

"What happened, Richard?"

Rubbing his face with his hands, Richard stared across the campsite at Kahlan's sleeping form as he began to speak. "I told her that I was going to take her back to Aydindril. I wanted you to stay with her to help protect her while Cara and I continued the search for the Stone of Tears. Once the rift was sealed, I told her I would come back for her and we could be married. She became so angry, saying that I was trying to send her away and that I was making decisions for her without discussing it with her. I guess I did, but I was only thinking of her.

This afternoon when I saw her lying on the ground with all those soldiers surrounding her…something just snapped inside of me…I felt like my whole world had just been shattered. I won't survive if I lose her, Zedd," he whispered, fear a mask upon his face.

"Well, my boy, with all the joy and happiness that love brings, it can also carry a lot of heartache. You're just going to have to find a way to accept the risk that comes with loving the Mother Confessor."

"I love Kahlan and everything that comes along with loving her, Zedd! I finally proved my love was stronger than her powers; we can finally be together without fear of her magic affecting me. But every time she gets hurt, I feel like I'm letting her down; I'm not protecting her like I promised her I would. If she dies, Zedd, it will be my fault! How am I suppose to live without her let alone live with the fact that she died because I couldn't save her?!" he responded, chest heaving again with a renewed wash of guilt and anger.

"Richard, you can't carry the heavy burden alone. Kahlan is not completely helpless; she's more powerful than either of us can possibly imagine. Not to mention Cara and I are here to help you protect her."

"I know, but it's my responsibility to protect her. If I can't protect her, how can I marry her and make her my wife?" he whispered, admitting his greatest fear.

"I know you will figure out a way. I have never seen a love like the two of you have. It stronger than magic, even the Keeper's powers. Trust your heart, Richard…trust Kahlan. Sleep on it, my boy. I know you two will make the right decision," Zedd replied giving his grandson's shoulder a loving squeeze as he stood to his feet.

Richard continued to watch Kahlan as she slept peacefully, taking in the graceful curve of her body, the steady rise and fall of her breathing. He wanted so badly to go over to her and wrap his body around hers, to tell her how sorry he was that he had hurt her, to breathe in her scent, to fall asleep with her head nestled into the crook of his neck, her breath warming his skin. Unfortunately, he knew he would be sleeping alone tonight. Lying down on his bedroll, Richard turned so he could at least see her from where he was.

"Good night my sweet Kahlan," he whispered with deep longing as sleep rapidly claimed him.

XXX

_Running…trying to reach her…panting for air…legs so heavy. Can't…get…there… _

_Kahlan laying on the ground…her head bleeding… _

_A dagger coming straight down at her heart… I can't…reach her… KAHLAN!!! NO!!!_

Lurching forward, his breath coming out in pants, Richard ran his hands over his face as he attempted to push the horrifying nightmare from his head. Looking about him, he noticed Cara adding more twigs to the fire as Zedd sat eating breakfast.

"Bad dream?" Cara asked as she turned to look at the Seeker.

"You could say that," he grumbled as he attempted to calm his breathing. Standing to his feet, Richard scanned the clearing. His heart began to pound as he noticed that Kahlan's things were gone.

"Kahlan is down at the lake taking a bath," Cara said without waiting for the question, the look of panic on his face speaking volumes.

"You let her go down to the lake by herself?" he exclaimed in agitation.

"Forgive me, Lord Rahl, but I believe the Mother Confessor is more than capable of bathing herself without my assistance," she scowled as she stood to her feet, placing her hands on her hips.

"I'm sorry, Cara," he sighed heavily. "I'm just still uneasy after yesterday."

"I'm going to go hunt for more food seeing how our Wizard with the bottomless stomach has already eaten it all," Cara huffed as she grabbed her bow and arrows before leaving the clearing.

"How was Kahlan's wound this morning?" Richard asked.

"I think it's the same as last night, but I'm not sure. She wouldn't even let me look at it let alone heal it," Zedd mumbled, mouth full of stew.

"What? Why wouldn't she let you heal it?"

"She said she was fine; she grabbed her things and headed for the lake. Kahlan will let me look at it when she's ready, Richard, and not before then. You know how strong willed she can be," Zedd attempted to reassure him, chuckling at how obstinate the Seeker and Confessor could be at times. It was a wonder those two hadn't locked horns a long time ago.

Richard smiled in spite of himself as he bent over and began packing his things when he heard approaching footsteps. Turning his head, Richard watched Kahlan as she entered their camp. His breath caught in his chest as she moved toward him. Wearing only her corset and skirt, her dark raven hair was wet, clinging to her shoulders and the tops of her creamy breasts.

The gash on her forehead was beginning to bruise around the edges, but was no longer oozing blood. It stood out significantly against her pale face. Her normally bright blue eyes were filled with hurt mingled with lingering anger.

The stiffness in her walk told Richard he better stay away at least for the time being, causing his heart to sink. He had hoped that by morning she would be more willing to talk to him, to listen to him and accept his reasoning. However, that was not going to happen any time soon.

Kahlan passed by him without a word or a touch. Richard would have preferred that Kahlan would yell at him, throw something at him, tell him how hurt she was, anything but this. He couldn't bear not talking to her, not being able to touch her or hold her, to kiss her, to feel her lips on his skin or her sweet breath on his face. Anger began to well up inside, merging with the sorrow that filled his heart. One way or another, he was going to make her understand.

Richard couldn't help but stare as Kahlan began brushing her luxurious hair that he loved, desire to run his hands through it steadily mounting. Standing to his feet, he threw his pack over his shoulder as his body ignited with arousal. He needed a bath and he hoped the lake was cold. "I'm going down to the lake to get cleaned up before we head out," he finally said, hoping she would acknowledge him.

"Alright, I'll save you some breakfast," Zedd answered, instead of Kahlan, to Richard's dismay as he left the campsite.

XXX

Even though the rising sun was casting its intensely warm rays, the air was decidedly cool among the travelers. Richard guided the way with compass in hand followed closely by Zedd and Cara. Kahlan was several paces behind, bringing up the back of the group. Her brow furrowed, she was obviously still upset about the argument last night and not in any mood to talk about it just yet.

Ever since leaving camp that morning, the tension had been thick enough to suffocate the life out of a Gar. Zedd knew the lovers would resolve their difference of opinion while Cara was growing visibly more annoyed as the day wore on.

Richard glanced back over his shoulder to check on Kahlan. She looked exhausted, her eyes reflecting the pain Richard knew she felt from the head injury. It pricked his heart to see her like this, but she had refused to let Zedd heal her. Richard knew it was only because she was still angry with him. Even though their minds were no longer linked, he could always read her mind by the expression on her face.

He knew one of them was going to have to let go of their pride and apologize. Richard had a feeling it was going to be him. Spirits, this woman was going to be the death of him. He didn't think his resolve was going to last another night of sleeping alone; he was growing frustrated in more ways than one.

Casting one more glance back at his irate Confessor, Richard caught the glint of sunlight reflecting off of steel, causing his heart to catch in his throat. "Kahlan! Get down!" he shouted as a Dacra came whirling at her head.

Seeing the sudden look of terror on Richard's face, Kahlan ducked just as a Dacra sliced through her hair over her head, narrowly missing Cara before it landed harmlessly in a tree. Whirling on her heel, the Mother Confessor withdrew her daggers in one swift motion, chest heaving with rage at the surprise attack on her and her companions.

Grabbing his sword, Richard watched with fear as Kahlan raced towards the Sisters of the Dark who were standing in perfect formation, ready to slay his lover. As Richard rushed to her defense screaming her name, everything seemed to move in slow motion. His heart seized with panic, his legs felt like lead. He couldn't get to her fast enough. It was as if his worst nightmare was coming true.

Cara and Zedd began to attack with a vengeance as one Sister after another fell, being sent to meet their master. Richard stared in wide-eyed horror as Kahlan sliced her daggers with ease as she fought two Sisters at once, unaware of Sister Nicci approaching from behind.

"Kahlan!" Richard screamed, but his cry could not be heard over the fighting.

Kahlan, however, turned in time to be greeted by Sister Nicci's Dacra as it plunged into her heart. Collapsing to the ground, Kahlan stared up into the smirking face of the Keeper's faithful minion as her blood pounded loudly in her ears. Gasping for air, Kahlan attempted to grab Nicci as she bent over to retrieve her Dacra but the Sister quickly pulled away with a mocking laugh that rang in the Confessor's ears.

"Tell the Keeper I said 'you're welcome'," Nicci hissed in satisfaction, a broad smile spreading across her face as she looked up to see the Seeker racing for her. With a whisk of her hand, Sister Nicci slowly began to vanish, a derisive smirk on her face as she stared at Richard, giving him a wink before completely disappearing.

Richard roared with rage as he cut down each Sister that stood in his way of getting to his lover. "KAHLAN!! NOOO!!" he screamed, his voice sounding barely more than a whisper as his heart pounded wildly in his ears.

His sword slipped from his hands as the Seeker dropped to his knees beside his fallen Confessor. Tears began to trickle down his cheeks as he stared into the pale face of his beloved. Her once vivid blue eyes that he adored were rapidly losing their light.

"Kahlan! Kahlan, stay with me…focus on me…" Richard gasped as he attempted to choke back his tears. Taking her face in his hands, he leaned down pressing his lips to her forehead before finding her lips, his tears falling on her face.

"Rich..ard…" she softly whispered between gasps for air, weakly raising one hand to caress his cheek. "I…love…"

Sorrow washed over him like an angry wave crashing down on him, threatening to wipe away his sanity as he gazed into the now lifeless eyes of his Confessor, her hand falling limply to her side.

"Kahlan?" he whispered as he tenderly stroked her face, silently begging her not to leave him. Tears now coursed freely as his heart broke from the sheer agonizing pain that came with losing his reason for living. "No…don't go…damn it, Kahlan! I love you! I promise I'll do anything you want…just please don't leave me…"

Pulling her up into his arms, Richard sobbed uncontrollably. "I'm so sorry I failed you…I'm so sorry my beautiful Kahlan."

Stunned, Zedd and Cara could only stand helplessly by as they watched the Seeker holding his dead Confessor. Reaching down, Zedd brushed his hand across her face, closing her eyes. Startled, Richard sat up and stared at them.

"Cara! You can give Kahlan the breath of life! Please, Cara, save her!" he pleaded desperately, grasping for any last hope that his love could be brought back to life as he jumped to his feet and grabbed the Mord'Sith by the arms.

"I'm sorry…it's too late, Richard" she murmured as she stared into her Lord Rahl's watery red eyes.

"It's not too late!" Richard shouted, confusion and rage mingling with the anguish that coursed forcefully through his veins. It couldn't be too late. Kahlan just died; she was still warm. "Just do it!" he hissed.

Seeing Zedd give her a small nod, Cara knelt down beside the Mother Confessor. Leaning down, Cara released a small glowing vapor of air from her mouth that passed through Kahlan's lips. Standing back, Cara watched as Richard sank back down to his knees, waiting in desperate anticipation for her blue eyes to flutter open, to hear her say his name once more.

Moments slowly slipped by without any response. Reaching a trembling hand, Richard began to stroke her dark hair from her face. Lying down beside her again, he rested his forehead against her temple as his last flicker of hope extinguished with his lover's life.

Murmuring his love for her in her ear, Richard caressed her cheek as he wept. He lightly traced her soft lips with his fingertips; the lips he loved to kiss and loved feeling pressed against his own. Renewed anguish flooded his soul as he realized her lips would never again touch his flesh. Nuzzling his nose into her ear, he closed his eyes against the wash of tears.

"I love you my precious Kahlan…please don't make me go on without you…"


	3. Chapter 3

Whoops! I killed the Mother Confessor! Please don't hate me! Just keep hanging with me…

**Nightmares**** (Chapter 3)**

Lying beside her, Richard stared into the lifeless face of his Confessor. He had never felt such numbness mixed with pure anguish. He felt as if he was dead and yet he knew he was alive and breathing. The seemingly endless brutal torture he had endured at the hands of Denna and her agiel paled mightily in comparison to the agony that now consumed his heart, body, and soul.

Memories of their first night together began flashing through his mind only serving to increase the excruciating heartache. The feel of her soft flesh pressed hotly against his, their shared cries of ecstasy, the feel of being inside of her, the passionate love they had shared were all scorched into his memory. While precious to him, they also deepened his sorrow, threatening to suffocate him.

Richard wanted nothing more than to die at that moment, silently begging the Spirits to take his life. Life had lost all meaning, no longer held any reason to go on. It felt like someone had just reached into his chest and ripped out his heart, leaving a gaping hole where it had once beat wildly for his Confessor.

"I swear on my life, Kahlan, I will make Nicci pay," he softly whispered before placing a tender kiss to her temple.

As thoughts of Sister Nicci began swarming in his mind, rage and hatred began brewing in his soul. He vowed he would not rest until he had hunted Nicci down and made her pay for what she had done to his Kahlan. The Keeper, the rift, the compass, the Stone of Tears…they no longer mattered. As far as he was concerned his quest was now over. There was no longer any reason to save the world for it was no longer worth living in. The only thing that held any value to him now was killing Nicci.

Kill Nicci. The words kept echoing in his ears like an anthem, like a battle cry that would not nor could not be silenced. Something in those words began to unlock a distant thought in the back of his mind. Kill Nicci. If he kills Nicci…her Han would be released. He could recapture his Han. He would have the magical ability to bring Kahlan back to life himself. The Sisters of the Light had told him that there had not been a Wizard as powerful as he in many years. Could he bring Kahlan back to life?

Releasing his tight hold on Kahlan, Richard jumped to his feet. Finding his sword, he placed it back in its scabbard. Wiping the tears from his face, Richard felt a renewed sense of hope and purpose. Kill Nicci, regain his Han, save Kahlan. It had to work. He had to try. He had nothing else in life to lose.

If he lost his life, Richard would be reunited with his love in the Underworld and the heart-searing pain would be gone. If he regained his Han, he could save Kahlan.

Seeing the Seeker on his feet and the wild look in his eye, Cara and Zedd guardedly approached him. "Richard, what is it? What are you doing?" Cara warily asked with narrowed eyebrows.

"Stay with Kahlan and keep her safe. I'm going after Nicci," he ordered, the flicker of hope reigniting in his soul.

"Richard, Kahlan is gone. There is nothing…" Zedd soothingly began.

"Zedd, I don't have time right now! I have to find Nicci. If I kill her, I can reclaim my Han and I might be able to save Kahlan," he spat out as he started to march past them.

"You don't even know where Nicci is. She could be anywhere by now!" Cara stated, grabbing Richard's arm as he stormed past her.

"She couldn't have gone far. I saw the look she gave me just before she vanished. She wants me to come after her so she can torment me about killing Kahlan."

"You don't even know if you can bring Kahlan back," Zedd interjected.

"Zedd, I have to try…or I'm just a walking dead man," he growled as he took off in the direction he suspected the Sister of the Dark would have gone.

Cara and Zedd could only stare as they watched the Seeker take off in his new quest. His quest of revenge… and of resurrection.

XXX

As he raced through the dense woods, Richard's mind was a conflicted whirlwind of thoughts, memories, and emotions. "Focus, damn it!" he angrily growled to himself. He had to stay focused if Kahlan had any chance of returning to him.

Swallowing hard against the returning sorrow, Richard was filled with memories of their last words; words that had been spoken in anger and fear. A conversation that had been started out of his love for her had become a full-blown argument.

"I'm so sorry, Kahlan," he murmured as tears collected in his eyes again as regret and guilt seeped into his heart.

Their last words to each other had been said with such heated emotion and anger. He wished he could take it all back, tell her how sorry he was that he had hurt her, tell her how much he loved her, how desperately he wanted to share his life with her.

The sky was rapidly growing darker by the moment as he continued to race through the woods searching for Sister Nicci. He felt like he had been running for hours, but he knew he could not stop. Not if he wanted a chance to save Kahlan.

Seeing a faint orange glow in the distance, Richard slowed his pace, his breath coming out in short pants. Cautiously, he approached the beacon of light that was drawing him ever closer to his prey. He knew it had to be Sister Nicci. She took great pleasure in causing pain and he knew she would ache for the chance to terrorize him about Kahlan's death.

Stepping into the small clearing, Richard carefully scanned the area, knowing full well that he was walking straight into a deadly trap. But he didn't care. He didn't care about anything anymore except for getting Kahlan back. As far as he was concerned, he was in a win-win situation.

Sitting down on a rock, Richard kept a tight grip on his sword as he waited for Nicci to return. His jaw was clenched tightly, his brown eyes were set hard like steel, desperation radiating off his body in waves, his breathing erratic. His heart, however, was still missing.

"So, what took you so long, Richard?"

Whirling around, Richard watched with contempt as Sister Nicci slithered into the clearing, a smirk upon her face. Jumping to his feet, Richard tightened his grip on the hilt of his sword. His hands felt slick with sweat, his heart was pounding in his chest, his breathing ragged. He could not let Kahlan down again.

"How is your beloved Kahlan? I imagine she'll enjoy her time with the Keeper…that is once Darken Rahl is finished enjoying her. She's all your brother ever really talked about, that is when he wasn't complaining about you," she smiled sweetly as she slowly slinked her way around the Seeker.

Rage began to explode inside his soul as he listened to Nicci talk about Kahlan and what could be happening to her right at that moment. The thought of Darken Rahl anywhere near his lover made him almost insane with fury. Shoving aside the flood of nauseating images of Rahl having his way with his Kahlan, Richard attempted to channel his wrath at the Sister standing before him. He could not let Nicci get to him through Kahlan.

Keeping her distance, Nicci continued her taunts, thoroughly enjoying every minute of it. "So, are you here to try to steal your Han back?"

"Just coming for what's rightfully mine," he spat out between gritted teeth, his eyes locked on the treacherous Sister.

"Do you really think you will be able to kill me and get your Han back, Richard? As the Seeker, I thought you were smarter than that. I am more powerful than you can possibly imagine," she mocked with a sneer upon her lips.

"Well then I guess I'm not as smart as you thought."

"It's a futile attempt that will only get you killed in the end. Besides, regaining your Han won't bring Kahlan back."

"We'll see about that," he hissed as he charged towards her.

Raising her hands, Nicci released a flash of power that Richard quickly deflected with the Sword of Truth. Blocking the deadly magic, Richard battled the power that threatened to push him back and take his life. Why was he fighting it? Why not just let go of the sword and allow Nicci to kill him? He would be with his Kahlan in the Underworld, able to protect her from Rahl and the Keeper. The agonizing pain of separation would be over.

As Richard's grief began to weaken his resolve, Nicci gritted her teeth as she intensified the powerful blast of magic. Out of instinct, Richard tightened his grip, flexing his muscles as his resolve hardened once more. He had failed Kahlan before; he would not let her down now.

"_Richard…"_

The soft whisper of a familiar voice began to gently caress his mind. It was so soft, so subtle Richard could barely make it out causing him to temporarily lose his focus. Richard shook his head in an attempt to push aside the distraction.

"_Richard…"_

The sound of his name intruded his brain once more, taking his focus off the Sister of the Dark who was barely breaking a sweat as she continued her assault. The voice was so familiar, so comforting. Could it be his Kahlan calling out to him from the Underworld or maybe Zedd and Cara had found a way to bring Kahlan back to life.

"_Richard!"_

The voice was gaining strength, trying desperately to get his attention. Richard realized with mounting sorrow that it wasn't Kahlan who was calling out to him. He was quickly losing his strength and resolve as the voice kept tugging at him, coaxing his focus away from his deadly opponent. Richard was startled when the Sword of Truth was suddenly knocked out his hands. Heaving from exhaustion and anger, he stared into the scornful eyes of Sister Nicci.

"It doesn't have to end like this, Richard."

"You took the woman I love! I have nothing to live for! I already died out in that field when Kahlan took her last breath!" he screamed with rage, tears stinging his eyes once more.

Richard watched in anticipation as Sister Nicci slowly raised her arms once again. As her hands began to glow and crackle with the power of his Han, Richard closed his eyes as tears slowly slipped down his cheeks.

"I'm so sorry I failed you my beloved Kahlan," he whispered, his worst fears being realized.

A bright flash erupted from Nicci's hands as she blasted the Seeker with her powers. Richard was swiftly slammed to the ground with the force of the Sister's powers. He squeezed his eyes closed against the tormenting pain as it exploded in his body causing his nerves to feel as if they were ablaze.

"_**RICHARD!!**__"_

Richard finally allowed his mind to acknowledge the voice that had been beckoning to him. Slowly opening his eyes, Richard discovered he was no longer in pain. Sitting up, he quickly scanned his surroundings. He was no longer in the woods with Sister Nicci. Instead, he found himself lying on the ground in a dimly lit cave. Confused, he quickly sat up.

Feeling a hand on his shoulder, Richard turned around to find Zedd standing over him, a rag covering his nose and mouth. "Richard!"

"Zedd?!" he panted, eyes wide with confusion. "How'd I get here? Where's Sister Nicci?"

"Sister Nicci? She's not here; she's never been here. Richard, you've been trapped in this cave for almost two days," Zedd informed him as he pulled a rag from his pocket. "Here, put this over your nose and your mouth."

"Zedd, what is going on?" Richard demanded as he quickly tied the cloth around his face.

Helping his grandson to his feet, Zedd placed a steadying hand around his shoulders. "Easy, give yourself a moment…you've been under the effects of a very powerful hallucinogen. We arrived in Irica two days ago. There was an accident. Their mines collapsed and several miners were trapped. You, Kahlan, and Cara went to the mines to rescue the miners while I stayed behind in the village to heal those who had escaped. One of the miners managed to escape on his own this morning. He described a glowing yellow substance that began to seep from the rocks and complained about having hallucinations. That's when I realized that the mines were laced with ayon."

"Ayon?"

"Yes, it's a very powerful hallucinogenic. When inhaled, it can cause hallucinations and visions. But if inhaled for long periods of times, it causes a person to go into a catatonic state. Your worst nightmares come to the surface and you begin to live it as if it is really happening."

"You mean everything I experienced wasn't real?" Richard gasped as he clutched the Wizard's arms, praying Kahlan was still alive. He tried desperately to shove aside the fog that still engulfed his mind, trying to connect his thoughts and understand what Zedd was telling him.

"No, none of it was real."

"Where's Kahlan, Zedd? I have to find her!"

"I don't know. I've been searching for hours; you were the first one I found."

"You haven't found Cara either?"

"No, only you, but we better find them soon. The longer you spend breathing in ayon, the worse its affects."

"What kind of affects?" he murmured, horror beginning to creep its way back into his heart.

"It will continue to intensify the nightmare to unbearably painful extremes. After so long, the affects are irreversible. They will stay in a catatonic state, forever reliving that nightmare over and over again until their hearts finally give out and they die."

"You can't bring them out of it?" he whispered in horror, not sure he wanted to hear the answer.

"No, not even my magic can reverse the affects. I was able to bring you out of it before it got that far. Let's just hope we can find Cara and Kahlan before that happens."

Not waiting to hear anymore, Richard began to race down the tunnel, desperation rapidly enveloping him. His nightmare had been almost beyond bearable and it hadn't even intensified yet. He could not imagine it having been any worse than it was. He had to find Cara and Kahlan before they were lost forever.

Richard had been so relieved that it had only been a nightmare, that it was over, and that Kahlan was alive. Now, however, he found that his nightmare was just beginning all over again…


	4. Chapter 4

Thank you so much for the encouraging comments everyone! They really do help. I'm glad you liked the twist I threw into this fic. It's been so much fun to write!

**Nightmares**** (Chapter 4)**

She had no idea where they had come from. Lord Rahl had been teasing her about her hunting skills when they suddenly found themselves surrounded by Teagon soldiers. The compass was unfortunately directing them through the Teagon territory which was ruled by the vile King Adama. He was a ruthless ruler who executed those who had the audacity to cross his territory.

Cara had an unsettling feeling in the pit of her stomach a split-second before the soldiers had appeared. They were very large men, dressed head to toe in dark grey leather with a crimson stripe that ran the length of their arms. Their helmets were metal with visors and a large crimson red feather that sat on the top, indicating their allegiance to their King.

Whipping her agiels from her waist, Cara growled in irritation as the four companions turned their backs towards each other, forming a tight circle of their own. Surveying the threat, they saw that they were greatly outnumbered as usual. There was going to be no talking their way out of this one.

Cara threw herself into the battle with her usual vengeance, placing herself in danger in order to protect Lord Rahl and her companions. Casting a look to her right, she spotted Richard slicing and thrusting his sword with supreme skill. Glancing to her left, she saw Kahlan wielding her daggers, slashing her way through soldier after soldier.

Cara turned back towards the approaching soldier, sweat on her brow, her chest heaving with exertion. As she battled her newest attacker, another soldier came in from the side. With a surprise kick of his large boot connecting with her side, Cara was sent flying into the Mother Confessor.

Stunned, Kahlan found herself lying on the ground, looking up into the face of the soldier she had been fighting. Before she could react, the soldier thrust his sword into her abdomen, twisting it with a sickening squelching sound.

Richard spun around at the sound of Kahlan's heartrending scream that caused his blood to suddenly turn to ice. "KAHLAN!!" he screamed in horror at the site of his lover lying on the ground, a sword sticking out of her abdomen.

Dazed, Cara got up on all fours in time to see Richard rushing to Kahlan's side. "No…Kahlan!" she gasped, stunned to see her lying on the ground dying.

"Richard…please…help me…" Kahlan cried, writhing in pain, tilting her head back as she tried every position to lessen the suffering. "It hurts so bad…Richard…please…" she panted, her eyes shut as tears streamed down her face as her hand clawed at his shirt in desperation.

Seeing his beloved struggling to hold onto her life, Richard's face was one of sheer terror. "Kahlan, I'm right here," he reassured her, grabbing her hand and clutching it tightly to his chest. "ZEDD!!" he shouted as tore his eyes away from Kahlan long enough to see Zedd finish off the last of the soldiers.

Cara quickly crawled to the Mother Confessor's other side. "Kahlan, I'm so sorry…It was an accident, I swear!"

"Cara, get back!" Richard angrily growled, as he leaned over to cup the side of Kahlan's face. "Kahlan, it's alright. Hang on, my love…I'm right here…"

Cara sat back on her heels as Zedd ran to Kahlan's aid. Scooting back, Cara watched in horror as Kahlan grew paler by the moment, blood pouring from the gaping wound in her stomach as the Wizard removed the sword. Zedd closed his eyes as he began moving his hands over her stomach, concentrating his powers on the dying Confessor.

"Richard…" Kahlan murmured, her voice growing ever weaker, her head rolling from side to side as she fought to remain conscious. "Richard…" she cried in desperation, "I love you…never forget I love you…"

Tears began to pool in the Seeker's eyes as he watched the life slowly seep from his lover's body. "Stay with me, Kahlan. Don't do this! Zedd, do something!!" he shouted at the Wizard.

Cara could no longer fight the tears that begged for release. "Richard…it was an accident…you have to believe me…" She couldn't believe this was happening. She should have seen that soldier coming at her from the side. If she had been paying better attention, this never would have happened.

"Kahlan?! Kahlan!" Richard frantically cried as his soul-mate lost the battle and surrendered to the beckoning arms of unconsciousness. "Zedd?" he desperately searched his grandfather's face for any sign of hope that he could save her.

Sitting back on his heels, Zedd released a fatigued sigh. "I've done all I can do. I'm afraid it's up to Kahlan now."

"What? What are you saying, Zedd?" he demanded, anger and dread filling his eyes, tears trailing down his cheeks.

"I've healed the worst part of the wound, but it was very large. She's lost a lot of blood, Richard." Reaching across Kahlan's bloody body, Zedd gave his grandson's shoulder a reassuring squeeze. "She's strong, Richard; she's a fighter."

"But she'll be ok, right?" he whispered, eyes wide in shock.

"It's too early to tell. We need to give her time to heal," he gently told him. "We better find a safe place to set up camp for the night before more soldiers show up."

Clutching Kahlan's hand to his chest, Richard stared at her with sorrow-filled eyes. "Lord Rahl, I'm so sorry," Cara whispered as she crawled back to Kahlan's side, desperate for her Lord's forgiveness.

After several moments, Richard slowly raised his head to stare into Cara's eyes, his own eyes hardening with grief and anger. "Cara, go away," he hissed.

"It was an accident…" she whispered again, her lip quivering with grief.

"Cara, go!"

"Richard, listen to me…"

"Get out of here! I don't want you around here anymore! You almost cost Kahlan her life!"

"It was an accident!" she cried, her heart ready to burst with anguish.

"And was it an accident when you killed Dennee?" he glared at her, contempt dripping from his words.

"You know I was ordered to do that by Darken Rahl. I had no choice!" she yelled, her body trembling with anger and hurt. How could he throw that in her face after all these months together? He knew she had changed since then; she was no longer the person she had been back then.

"And I have no choice…I have to protect Kahlan," he coldly stated as he turned his attention back to his lover. Crouching down, Richard gently lifted his Confessor into his arms. Turning his back to the Mord'Sith, Richard softly said, "Good-bye, Cara."

Cara stayed on her knees for several moments after Richard and Zedd left with Kahlan, too stunned to move. Tears began falling down her cheeks as her heart began to break. She could hardly believe this was happening. It had to be dream…a very bad dream.

Where was she going to go? What was she going to do? She didn't know anything else except being Mord'Sith, of protecting the Lord Rahl. She was no longer a Sister of the Agiel and now she was no longer protector to the Lord Rahl.

XXX

Cara sat staring into the flickering flames of the small campfire she had built. Her mind and heart were a tumult of conflicting emotions. Anger, hurt, betrayal. She'd never felt so lost in her whole life.

She had finally been happy for the first time in her life. Her childhood long forgotten, distorted and taken by the Mord'Sith, Cara was finally beginning to understand what it was to be part of a true family. To be accepted and wanted not for what they could get out of you, but because of who you were. She had been seen as a unique individual with her own set of special qualities and gifts, not a woman to be broken and trained into doing her master's bidding.

Richard Cypher-Rahl had accepted her, welcomed her into their group, defended her to everyone, took her side when everyone sought to end her life. The Mord'Sith who were supposed 'sisters' had even turned against her, but he had taken her side even over the woman he loved above all else. He had believed in her when no one else would.

His compassion had broken through her thick barriers, punched holes in her walls and had reached her long dormant heart. And now, even he had turned his back on her. She guessed it had been only a matter of time before Richard would have eventually turned against her too. Her hard edges and thick exterior kept everyone at arm's length.

Anger began smoldering again in her heart, threatening to harden what Richard had touched with his kindness and faith in her. She was Mord'Sith. She needed no one; she could take care of herself. Clenching her jaw, her watery eyes began to set like steel. She berated herself for becoming so weak over the last several months, for allowing the Seeker, Confessor, and Wizard to bring out emotions that she had long since learned to bury and ignore.

Cara's back stiffened as she became aware of a presence somewhere behind her. Something was lurking just outside the small clearing. As she reached down for her agiels, Cara was suddenly struck from behind. Lying face down on the ground, she quickly felt a boot slammed into her back, knocking the wind out of her lungs.

She squirmed, fighting fiercely to break free from the boot that had her pinned. She unexpectedly felt warm breath on her ear as she desperately tried to breathe.

"Cara," the voice seductively began. "It's been too long."

The unexpected familiar voice sent a chill down her spine. It was a voice she hoped she would never hear again as she forcefully resisted the fear that threatened to well up inside of her. She would never show fear, least of all to her.

"Josie," Cara flatly stated, voice devoid of any hint of emotion. "I thought you'd be dead by now."

"If you'd had your way, I would have been," she murmured in Cara's ear before dipping her tongue in it.

Before Josie could pull away, Cara instinctively slammed her head into the side of her attacker. Knocking her off balance, Cara was easily able to escape her precarious position. Leaping to her feet, Cara grabbed her agiels to find herself surrounded by ten Mord'Sith.

Holding the side of her head, Josie slowly approached Cara. "Nice move; glad to see you haven't completely lost the abilities that were beaten into you."

"What do you want, Josie?" Cara hissed as her eyes took in her Sisters who were standing ready to attack, agiels in hand.

"Why you of course, Cara," Josie purred, giving a slight nod to her Sisters.

With the little tilt of their leader's head, the Mord'Sith circled closer to their prey. Cara was not about to just sit back and allow them to take her without a fight. She quickly side-stepped one agiel that came straight at her throat as she swung her arms, connecting one agiel to a heart and another to the side of a head.

Cara swiftly raised a boot, hitting a Mord'Sith's jaw. With a sickening cracking of bone, the Sister flew backwards, blood pouring from her mouth. That's three, Cara thought to herself. Just seven more to go…and then Josie.

Josie watched as Cara fought impressively with great determination and skill. She knew Cara could handle herself, but she was not about to lose her prize. As Cara was distracted in the fight, Josie sauntered up to her prey. Raising her agiel, she slammed it across Cara's head, knocking her to ground unconscious. Crouching down beside her fallen Sister, Josie gently wiped some of the blood from Cara's forehead and brought to her lips. Tasting Cara's blood, Josie softly whispered, "Welcome back to the fold, Sister."

XXX

Her body ached all over, her head too heavy and painful to hold up. Slowly opening her eyes, Cara attempted to focus her blurred vision. As shapes and images began to become clearer, Cara got a sickening nauseated feeling in the pit of her stomach. She was back.

Taking in the familiar brown brick walls that lined the room, Cara recognized the blood stains that splattered the walls of the training room. Looking up, Cara found her arms chained above her as she hung precariously over a pit.

Dressed only in her black tank and shorts, Cara shivered as much from fear as the coldness of the room. Mord'Sith did not fear anything and yet here she was afraid. She had endured all that her torturers had thrown at her and become respected among her Sisters, even considered one of the best in years. Of course, though, no one ever could compare to Denna.

Now that she was back among her peers, she was actually afraid, but of what? She wasn't afraid of what they would do to her physically. She had learned long ago how to partition off her mind and endure all the pain that they could cause.

"Welcome home, Sister. It's been too long."

"Kerstin," she replied with disdain. "It's not been long enough."

"Now is that any way to greet your friend and fellow Sister of the Agiel?" Kerstin mockingly scolded as she circled Cara, a single finger tracing her flat stomach and around her back.

"I'm no longer your Sister. They turned me out months ago, remember?" her eyes flashing with rage at the memory of how they had beaten her and left her for dead.

"That was Triana's doing. Not all of the Sisters agreed with what she did."

"So, is this your way of apologizing and welcoming me back?"

"We rescued you, Cara."

"Rescued me from who?!" Cara asked incredulously.

"Why yourself, of course."

"Why would I need rescuing from myself?" Cara could hardly believe this conversation.

"Cara, you've gone soft spending all those months with the Seeker and Mother Confessor. I've heard rumors of how you've shown compassion, risked your life to save them, assisting the Seeker in his quest. What were you thinking?"

"I was thinking my Sisters had abandoned me and left me for dead. Lord Rahl was the only one who showed me any measure of compassion, who didn't look at me with disgust and disdain in his eyes for being Mord'Sith, who saw me as a real person."

"How sweet for you," she mockingly replied before her voice became hard again. "You're making the Mord'Sith look bad. We serve the Lord Rahl, Lord Darken Rahl."

"Darken Rahl is no longer Lord Rahl, Richard Rahl is. Darken Rahl is in the Underworld and I'm glad he's gone," Cara spat out, glaring at the Mord'Sith that continued to circle her. "Darken Rahl never deserved that title." Receiving a stinging slap across her face, Cara licked the trickle of blood that formed in the corner of her mouth.

"You will relearn the respect that you have so quickly abandoned and forgotten or you'll die in the process," Kerstin seethed with restrained rage. "Get plenty of rest, dear Cara. Your training begins in the morning, Sister."

Closing her eyes, Cara attempted to calm her breathing. She had to find a way out of this. She was not about to allow them to try and break her again. Not after all that Richard Rahl had taught her about herself, not after tasting what humanity was like. Now that she had tasted what life could be like, she was not about to give it up so quickly. Not for anyone. Not now, not ever…


	5. Chapter 5

Thanks for all the reviews and for following along with me…

**Nightmares**** (Chapter 5)**

She awoke with a start, realization of her current situation slamming hard into her subconsciousness. Her arms were burning like fire as she swayed gently, her hands still shackled above her head. The steel chains were beginning to dig into her wrists, causing them to bleed.

Hearing the sound of scampering feet, Cara looked to see a large rat scurrying across the cold stone floor, tentatively sniffing the ground as it searched for food. Having hated rats ever since she was a small child, her heart began to pound at the site of the rodent, praying it would leave just as quickly as it had arrived.

Trying desperately to ignore her furry little visitor, Cara attempted to focus on something else. Her thoughts began to drift back to her friends. Worry about the condition of the Mother Confessor began to seep into her heart as well as concern for her friends' welfare and fear for their safety.

A sudden flood of loneliness washed over her. She felt so abandoned and alone. She wondered if they even knew or cared about what had happened to her. If they had somehow discovered what had happened, would they even come to her rescue?

Deep down, she knew she couldn't rely on them anymore. She was on her own again, relying on the only person she could always count on – herself. Walling off the heartache that threatened to mount up inside of her, Cara attempted to refocus her thoughts again. She couldn't allow her fears and despair to dominate logic.

"_Damn Lord Rahl for bringing out these useless emotions in me!"_ she bitterly thought to herself, but couldn't suppress the smirk that formed on her lips at the thought of him.

Even though Richard had summarily dismissed her, Cara couldn't help but feel a warm place in her heart for him. It had hurt her deeply to see the pain she had caused him, to see his anger and disappointment. She had failed to protect Kahlan and had thus let him down. This was her worst nightmare come to life – letting her Lord Rahl down, him turning his back on her and sending her away.

Pushing aside the overwhelming sadness, Cara attempted to tilt her head back to rest against her aching arms. Her neck was stiff from hanging down all night. Having dozed off periodically, Cara had been able to get a little sleep. She knew she was going to have to conserve as much of her strength as possible if she was going to escape.

Closing her eyes, Cara took several slow deep breaths in an attempt to clear her mind and focus her thoughts. As she struggled to develop a plan of escape, she could hear the distant sound of approaching boots as they struck the stone floor. Cara decided it sounded like two sets of boots coming towards her. Two Mord'Sith were nothing for her to overcome. The only problem was getting her hands free.

She swallowed hard against the rush of anxiety. It was not the physical pain and torture she knew that was in store for her in the imminent future, but the mental and emotional war that she knew was going to have to fight.

Physical pain was nothing to Cara. She could endure more than most as her tolerance was incredibly high. She'd endured so many broken bones through her training and the countless fights since then that she had quickly lost track.

No, the physical pain would be minimal compared to the brutal mental and emotion assault that was to come. And no one was better at it than Mistress Kerstin. There was not a human being on the face of the planet that Kerstin could not mentally break. She could have the strongest minded man kneeling and weeping at her feet within less than a week just from an emotional and mental attack alone.

"Cara, time to start your retraining," Kerstin cheerfully announced as she waltzed into the training room accompanied by Mistress Dayna.

"I don't need to be retrained," Cara spat out, teeth clenched as she glared angrily at her Sisters of the Agiel. "I'm the same person I was when Triana left me for dead."

"We both know that is not true," Kerstin lightly chuckled before slamming her agiel into Cara's side.

Cara barely flinched as she locked icy stares with Kerstin who continued to inflict pain on her former friend. Cara was not about to give her the satisfaction of seeing her writhing in pain or begging for mercy. Kerstin could rot in the Underworld before she would give her that satisfaction.

Mistress Kerstin finally withdrew the agiel after realizing she wasn't going to get much of a reaction out of the wayward Mord'Sith. She abruptly decided to take a different approach as she slowly began circling her blond-headed prey, the palm of her hand caressing the head of her agiel as she contemplated her next move.

"So, Cara, tell me about this new Lord Rahl that is also the Seeker of Truth. What is it about him that you admire so much that causes you to follow him to the ends of the earth?" Kerstin inquired in a softer tone as she smoothed her long red braid that hung down her back.

"Why do you want to know, Kerstin? You've already said that he is no Darken Rahl," Cara suspiciously asked, trying to calm her breathing. She was not about to be bated into an argument that would either further her breaking or provide Kerstin any information that would lead them to Richard. There was no telling what the Mord'Sith could be up to now that they were without a true leader. For all she knew, they could be planning to take over D'Hara for themselves.

"Just curious as to what is so great about Richard Rahl that would make you follow him all over the Midlands and risk your life to protect him," she simply stated as she continued to saunter around her dangling prisoner.

Cara cast a wary eye at Mistress Dayna who stood by the entrance, arms crossed across her chest, her long black braid dangling over her shoulder. She was listening intently but not participating in the interrogation. Cara knew it was only a matter of time before she also joined in the fun.

"Why don't you let me down and I'll tell you all about him?" Cara muttered, knowing that her words were only going to earn her another encounter with the agiel. Bracing herself for the excruciating pain that was to come, Cara was instead surprised by Kerstin's response.

"Seriously, Cara, I want to know what is so special about this Lord Rahl you now serve," Kerstin softly asked, stopping to stare straight into Cara's eyes.

Cara was taken aback by the sincerity she found residing in Kerstin's face, her captor's bright green eyes displaying curiosity. She didn't know whether it was real or just a trap to earn Cara's trust, but she decided to play along for the time being until she knew for sure. She couldn't let her guard down, not even for a second; not with Kerstin. That's when she would swoop in and take you by surprise.

"He's a kind, compassionate man who puts the needs and welfare of others before himself. He showed me compassion and trust when no one else would even give me a second glance," Cara finally replied.

"And how do you know he's not using you just like Darken Rahl used us?"

"Because Richard Rahl saved my life. When did Darken Rahl ever risk his life to save a Mord'Sith?" she questioned with contempt, already knowing the answer.

"The Lord Rahl never need risk his life for a Mord'Sith. It is our duty to risk our lives for him. Besides, I'm curious as to why you were alone when we found you if Richard Rahl is everything you claim him to be."

"I failed him," Cara sadly replied, hanging her head in shame.

"Failed him?" Kerstin asked, confused. "Failed him how?"

"I failed to protect the Mother Confessor's life," she shamefully admitted, a distant look in her eye as the event replayed itself before her in her mind.

"If he is kind and so much better than Darken Rahl, then why did he send you away for something as ridiculous as that?"

"Because she is his life," Cara replied in a barely audible voice, her shame and guilt permeating the room and wrapping around her like a heavy blanket trying to suffocate her. Tears stung her eyes and trickled down her cheeks as she remembered the look of grief and hurt on her Lord's face when he sent her away.

After all he had done for her, she had failed to protect the one person he valued most. His words began to replay in her mind like a chant mocking her and deepening her humiliation. Cara hadn't felt such heartache since the first time she had been broken. Even when Leo had died, it had hurt her, but not as much as this.

Cara was violently shaken from her reverie by the excruciating sting of the agiel against her side causing her ribs to crack and fracture under the stress. She couldn't stop the cry that slipped past her lips with the splintering of her ribs.

"What?!" Cara cried, gasping in air. Each intake and release of air only further increased her pain. She desperately searched her mind for that calm center where she could hide from the torture and agony.

"I asked you if Richard Rahl cared so much about you then why would he discard you like he did. I mean if he truly cared would he really just toss you aside so easily? Admit it, Cara. He used you and then when you became useless to him, he left you."

"No! That's not true!" Cara cried, shaking her head against the Mord'Sith's words. It couldn't be true. Richard would never do that to her; she had deserved being sent away.

Pressing close to her victim, Kerstin gently began stroking Cara's blond hair. "I'm truly sorry that Richard Rahl fooled you into trusting him," she softly murmured into Cara's ear. "You've been deceived my dear Sister. I am here to help welcome you back into the only family that has ever truly cared about you, the only ones that ever will care about you – your Sisters of the Agiel."

XXX

Hanging by her wrists, Cara knew she was a bloody broken mess. She had no idea how many days had passed since first being captured by the Mord'Sith. At this point, the only thing she did know for sure was her name. Cara. That was her name. Did she have a last name? If she did, Cara had no idea what it was.

Her body hummed with agonizing pain that never ceased, not even for a moment. Every breath she took only served to further increase her suffering. She tried to swallow but found her mouth and throat too dry to do so. Opening her swollen eyes, she found she could barely keep them open. Closing her eyes again, she tried to center her mind once more. She needed to find that clear peaceful center in the midst of the tempestuous storm that controlled her mind, away from the excruciating pain that raged throughout her body.

As she narrowed her thoughts, images began to form in her mind. Images of her sister the day she was taken by the Mord'Sith, images of her father being brought before her in the dungeon. Then other images began to take shape. Images of a tall gray-haired man. What was his name? He was a grandfather-figure to her. Why couldn't she remember his name?

The image was swiftly replaced by that of a beautiful woman. Her hair was dark, her eyes the brightest blue Cara had ever seen. They were filled with love and compassion, her face held tremendous strength and authority. She was someone of great importance, someone that Cara respected greatly. At the same time, Cara felt grief at the thought of her. Grief mingled with concern. Had something happened to this woman?

With the woman came the face of a handsome man. It was a man with soft brown eyes that were also filled with great compassion. Cara remembered that he was someone of great importance to her, but why? Was he her brother? Her cousin? A lover? No, she softly shook her head. He was a…friend. And yet there was something more. A bond…there was a great bond between them. She was his protector.

Then she remembered something. She had failed him somehow. This man had helped her in so many ways and she had let him down. Tears began to pour from her eyes as grief and guilt merged to crush her soul.

"_I have to stay strong…I cannot lose my heart or my soul…he would want me to hold tightly to it and not give it up…" _she thought to herself.

This man had helped her to begin to let go of her past and embrace who she was as a person. She was more valuable than she had been trained to be. She was more than just a weapon of danger, more than a body used for someone else's pleasure, more than a shield for her abuser's safety. This man had showed her what she had lost. She had lost her childhood innocence, her heart and her soul. He was helping her get that back. He showed her friendship and love for who she was not for what she could do for him.

Above everything she had feared failing him, but now just as terrifying was the thought of losing what she had discovered – herself. Cara knew she couldn't let them take that again. But they were. Slowly, day by day, hour by hour, bit by bit, they were taking her very essence, the part of her that made her Cara and were bending it and twisting it to their wishes. She couldn't let that happen. Not again…


	6. Chapter 6

Poor Cara...I've really put her through the ringer! :( I love how this chapter turned out. Hope you all agree! Thanks for the comments everyone! Keep 'em coming! :)

**Nightmares**** (Chapter 6)**

"My name is Cara…my name is Cara…my name is Cara…" the blond murmured over and over again, a mantra in her mind as her head fell from side to side.

"You are Mord'Sith."

"I am Cara…I am Cara…"

"You are Mord'Sith!"

The words sent a shock of agony through her brain as the agiel connected with her throat sending excruciating pain soaring throughout her body. She was Mord'Sith but more than that she was Cara. Her fragile hold on her sanity was weakening by the moment as she felt her humanity slipping through her fingers.

"Who are you?!" Kerstin shouted at her once more.

"I am Cara. I protected Lord Richard Rahl," she hissed as she raised her head in defiance, locking an icy stare on the Mord'Sith before her. Richard Rahl. That was his name. She finally remembered his name. She would try harder to hang on to it; to not let them wipe his name or his memory from her mind again.

"Why do you insist on making me hurt you?" Kerstin regretfully asked, her eyes conveying sadness and guilt that Cara knew was not really there. "Cara, we used to be close friends. It hurts me to have to cause you pain."

"Kerstin, you know as well as I do that you are enjoying every bit of this," Cara spit out as she closed her eyes and tilted her head back against the rough wooden table she was chained to, mentally preparing herself for the punishment to come for her insolence. "You never regret or have one moment of guilt over any training you get to participate in…not even for me."

"You're wrong, Cara. I actually envied you a little bit," she wistfully replied. "You were free from all of this, free to feel again, to embrace who you were born to be."

"If you feel so guilty then why don't you let me go?"

"Because this is who we are; this is who were born to be," she softly said as she slammed the agiel into Cara's temple. "We are Mord'Sith."

Exhaustion and the endless torture were shattering her resolve. Her high pain tolerance was even wavering under the continued stresses. Her sanity was hanging by a thread.

"Just give in, Cara, and it can all be over. Just say the words and the pain can cease," Kerstin leaned down to whisper in her friend's ear as she released her agiel. "It's just four simple words…who are you?"

"I…am…" Cara stuttered as tears escaped the corners of her eyes and disappeared into her hair. Her lips trembled with the words Kerstin demanded she say. She could feel bile rise in the back of her throat at the thought even saying those words again, of losing what shred of dignity and identity she had left.

"It's okay…just let it go," Kerstin softly purred in her ear as she stroked Cara's hair. "You're so close…you're almost there."

"I…am…Mo…" Cara choked, her chest heaving with panic. She couldn't let him down; couldn't go back to what she once was. What was his name again? He had kind brown eyes. How could she have forgotten again so quickly?

"Who are you?!" Kerstin demanded with a huff, agitation and impatience taking over again.

"I…am…CARA!!" she turned and screamed at the woman leaning over her, her eyes wild with determination.

Her steadfastness, however, ended with an excruciating scream as two agiels hammered her body, draining her of the last bit of resolve she had. As blackness of unconsciousness slowly began to take over her mind, she silently repeated, _"I am Cara…I am Cara…I am…"_

XXX

Racing through the treacherous tunnels of the mines, Richard's desperation was mounting quickly. He and Zedd had been searching the mines for hours and still had not found any sign of either Cara or Kahlan.

Richard came to a halt when the mine began to rumble again. Peering cautiously overhead, he prayed more cave-ins would hold off until they had gotten everyone out. He hoped Kahlan and Cara weren't buried under any of the numerous piles of rubble they had come across in their search. Zedd had been able to use his magic to look deep inside the rubble and had not found any bodies yet, much to their relief. Still, though, Richard would not rest until he had found Cara and that Kahlan was safely back in his arms.

Zedd came to a stop behind the Seeker also gazing above as little bits of rock and debris were shaken loose with the vibrations. He was growing exhausted with the constant searching. He had searched for hours before he had even found Richard and now several more hours had passed.

"Are you alright to continue?" Richard asked as he saw the exhaustion on his grandfather's face despite the rag he wore over his mouth and nose.

"Yes, we have to find Cara and Kahlan before it's too late," concern etched in his weary eyes as he took a drink from his water skin. "I may be old but I can still keep up with the likes of you, my boy," he chuckled.

"I'm sure you can," Richard smiled a small smile although unseen by his grandfather, worry still weighing heavily on his heart. Memories of the nightmare of losing Kahlan still lingered in his mind and rattled him to his core. It had been so real…too real. And now, it could be truly happening.

Taking the offered water skin, Richard took a drink. Handing the skin back to Zedd, Richard turned his head toward a noise. It was different than the rumblings and grumblings of their would-be tomb. It was a voice…a woman's cry.

"Did you hear that?" Richard asked, eyes narrowing as he concentrated on the sound.

Not waiting for a response, Richard took off in the direction of the noise, Zedd following closely on his heels. Turning another corner, Richard came to an abrupt stop at what he saw, relief and panic at war in his heart.

Cara was standing, pressed tightly against the rock wall. Her eyes were squeezed shut, tears streaming down her face. She had a cut on her right cheek, her breathing erratic. Her lips were moving as she trembled all over. Richard could tell that she was mumbling something, but he couldn't make out what she was saying.

"Be careful, Richard," Zedd softly warned. "She's under the effects of the ayon. She thinks that whatever is happening is real. There's no telling how she'll react when you try to bring her out of it. She may attack you."

"Cara," Richard softly began as he cautiously approached the Mord'Sith. "Cara, it's me…its Richard." As he got closer to her, he could hear what she was saying to herself.

"I am Cara…I am Cara…I am Cara," she muttered repeatedly. Her hands clenched tightly into fists, she began pounding them back into the rock wall she was pressed against. Her words were gradually getting louder and louder.

"I am Cara!...I am Cara!...I am Cara!"

"Cara, it's alright…open your eyes. It's Richard…it's Lord Rahl," he tried again, using the title she insisted on calling him in hopes of bringing her out of the nightmare that gripped her.

"I AM CARA!" she screamed, opening her eyes and startling Richard and Zedd with the force of her cry. Her eyes were wild with terror as she stared at Richard who now stood in front her.

"Cara, it's alright…you're safe now. It wasn't real; it was a nightmare," he gently soothed as he cautiously placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Richard?" she softly choked out in disbelief, her eyes wide, her lips trembling as tears continued to roll down her cheeks.

"Yes, Cara, it's me; it's Richard," he softly replied as he placed his other hand on her shoulder in an attempt to steady her.

Falling to her knees, Cara sobbed uncontrollably as she clung to Richard's legs. "I'm so sorry…please forgive me, Lord Rahl…please…I'm so sorry…it was an accident, I swear!"

Dropping to his knees, Richard gathered his friend into a tight embrace and held her as she sobbed. Zedd came and kneeled beside them, placing a comforting hand on her back. It was unnerving to see the strong-willed Mord'Sith so vulnerable, so emotional and human. It almost broke the Wizard's heart to see her like this.

"Cara, it wasn't real. It was a nightmare. None of it really happened," Richard murmured, her head resting on his shoulder as he gently stroked her hair. What could she possibly have dreamed to cause her to be so distraught like this?

Slowly as the fog began to dissipate from her brain, Cara pulled away to look into Richard's face as she tried to put all the pieces together. "It…it wasn't…real?" she softly choked out between hiccoughing gasps for air.

"No, we've been trapped in these mines for two days now. There's a deadly hallucinogenic in these mines that makes you live out your worst nightmare in your mind. None of it was real, Cara, I promise," he reassured her.

"Kahlan is alright?" she hesitantly asked, her voice still filled with panic.

"I don't know," he softly answered, his own voice cracking with emotion with the unknown condition of his Confessor. "We haven't found her yet. Zedd found me and then we started searching for you and Kahlan. That's when I heard your voice and we found you here."

"Here you need to put this on," Zedd told her as he handed her the rag. "Ayon is deadly if you continue to breathe it in."

Turning to look at the Wizard, Cara took the rag and began tying it around her face. "I'll help you search for her."

"No, Cara. You and Zedd start making your way out of here. I'll go after Kahlan. You breathed in more of the ayon than I did," Richard began as he pulled Cara up to her feet.

"Richard, you can't search for her alone. You are going to need us to help find her," Cara argued, needing to be with her Lord Rahl, to protect him and help him find his love.

"She's right, Richard. You may need our help. What if you can't bring her out of the nightmare? Kahlan could be trapped under rubble…" Zedd stopped himself before continuing his train of thought. The rising look of desperation and terror on his grandson's face told him Richard already knew the horrible possibilities.

"Alright…but if you can't keep up with me, you're both heading back," he warned them. He couldn't be slowed down, not with Kahlan's life at stake.

As they began to make their way through the next mining tunnel, Cara fell into step beside her Lord Rahl, needing to feel his presence. Still feeling apprehensive, she kept glancing at him to make sure he was really there. She could hardly believe that it had been a terrible nightmare. It had seemed so real. She had suffered the electric pain of the agiel against her body, had heard her Sisters' voices, had felt the agonizing heartache of failing her Lord Rahl.

Feeling Cara's uneasiness, Richard finally broke the silence. "Cara, are you sure you're alright?"

"Yes, it's just…it was so real," she replied with a visible shudder.

"I know what you mean. It was pretty disturbing," he softly said, his own heart and mind still trying to cope with the experience as he swallowed down the lump that had suddenly formed in his throat.

"It's something that I don't know if I'll ever be able to forget," she reluctantly confessed, the dire need to talk about what had happened to her suddenly overwhelming her.

"What was it?" he asked, concerned about how it had affected her. He hoped she would talk to him about it, hopefully help her deal with whatever had her so upset.

"I had failed you," she muttered, still feeling the sting of the words as she spoke them, the shame and guilt palpable.

"Failed me how?"

"I didn't protect Kahlan and she almost died. You became enraged and sent me away; you told me that I couldn't continue with you. The Mord'Sith captured me then because I needed to be retrained. They wanted to take away my humanity again," she told him, a distant look on her face as the events replayed themselves vividly in her mind.

"Cara, I would never send you away no matter what happens," he said, his brow furrowed with concern. He didn't want her to ever fear him or associate anything he did with her former Lord Rahl.

"But I caused Kahlan to be wounded; she almost died because of me…"

"Cara, I love Kahlan, she's my whole world, but I know that you would protect her with your life. I would hope that I would react differently than you dreamed."

"I know how much you love her and I would protect her with my life. My worst fear is failing you," she finally admitted.

"You have already proven yourself more times than I can count, Cara. You are an invaluable member of our group. Don't think that you're going anywhere any time soon because I'm afraid you're stuck with us."

"I guess I have no choice then," she murmured, smiling to herself. "Besides, someone has to keep you and the Mother Confessor out of trouble."

"Let's just hope we find her in time," he despondently replied, his heart racing with the fear that consumed it.

"We will, Lord Rahl. Kahlan is strong, one of the strongest women I've ever met."

"Cara, you aren't going soft on me now are you?" he smirked under the rag that covered his mouth and nose, glad Cara couldn't see his expression. He was surprised by her comforting words; it was so unlike the rigid Mord'Sith.

"No, you just caught me at a vulnerable moment. Enjoy it because it won't happen again."

Richard smiled to himself, enjoying this little glimpse that Cara had allowed into her soul. It was something that he very seldom got. It was encouraging to see her beginning to open up, to embrace who she was, her emotions as well as her fears.

"What was your nightmare about, Lord Rahl?" Cara hesitantly inquired, anxious to turn the conversation away from her.

"I had failed too…I failed to protect Kahlan," he painfully admitted, tears beginning to collect in his eyes at the image of Sister Nicci's Dacra buried in Kahlan's chest, her falling to the ground and dying in his arms. "Kahlan died because I couldn't protect her."

"You will not fail her, Richard. You are the Lord Rahl, the Seeker. I know you will do everything in your power to keep her safe. Zedd and I will also not let anything happen to her," she heatedly vowed.

"Thank you, Cara," he murmured, but his thoughts were far from where he was, far from this tunnel, far from Zedd and Cara. His thoughts were with the only woman he had ever and would ever love.

"_I'm coming, Kahlan; just hold on…"_ he said in his heart, praying that she would feel his love for her, feel all that he held inside for her, trying desperately to give her his strength to survive until he could get to her. _"I love you, my Kahlan…_


	7. Chapter 7

Ok, everyone…we're finally to Kahlan. Hope you like it. I am REALLY happy with this chapter!! Thanks for all your encouraging reviews!! :)

**Nightmares**** (Chapter 7)**

Walking through the woods listening to the owls hooting back and forth in their own private conversation, Kahlan silently walked the perimeter of their camp absorbed in her own thoughts. The moon was shining brightly as it peeked through the clouds that floated lazily before it while a gentle breeze cooled the warm summer air.

Even though Richard hated it when she was out here standing guard alone, Kahlan enjoyed taking her turn watching over the camp at night. She loved the moonlight that shone overhead, casting a yellowish glow on the earth below. The world was so calm, so peaceful at night. She could let her thoughts drift, reflect on the events of the day, work out her struggles. Her thoughts, however, always drifted back to where her heart forever beat; it always beat for Richard.

In the wee hours of the night before sunrise, there was no Keeper, no rift in the Underworld, no prophecies. All was right with the world. Besides that, she loved the fact that she was watching over her Seeker while he slept, keeping him safe from harm. She wanted to take care of him for the rest of her life.

Richard made her happy beyond her wildest dreams. The only thing that could possibly steal her happiness now was the Keeper and his followers. She couldn't control the shudder that vibrated through her body at the thought of the added danger she put her lover in.

"_As long as the Mother Confessor's pure heart beats, the Keeper is doomed to fail…"_ the prophecy drifted through her mind for the millionth time in weeks. Ever since learning of this new prophecy, it was almost all she could think about at times.

Kahlan was not afraid of dying. She was, however, terrified of what would happen to Richard in the Keeper's attempts to take her life or if the Keeper did succeed in ending it. She knew Richard would stop at nothing to keep her safe, including shedding his blood or laying down his own life for her protection. Her heart began to pound wildly at the thought of the extremes Richard would go to just for her. She knew she couldn't fault him because she knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that there was no limit she wouldn't go to for him.

"_My dear Kahlan, I can't wait until you join me here in the Underworld…"_

The dark haunting voice pierced her heart and invaded her thoughts, sending a cold chill to tingle down her spine, making the tiny hairs to stand up on the back of her neck. She thought she would never have to hear that voice again. And now, somehow, he was here.

"_Yes, Kahlan…it's me…your lover's brother…and your worst nightmare…"_

The voice chuckled with vile glee as if he witnessed the terror he had struck in her soul. Stopping in her tracks, Kahlan spun all around her, searching frantically in every direction for where the voice was coming from.

"Where are you, Rahl?!" she angrily growled with fury. How could he be here talking to her? He could not be here; he was dead and in the Underworld.

"_I'm everywhere that you are my beautiful Confessor…"_

"I am not yours!" she seethed, enraged by his intrusion into her thoughts and her life. Wasn't it bad enough that the prophecy haunted her like an evil specter, hanging over her? She knew it consumed Richard's heart and soul.

"_You will be sooner than you think. And if that meddling brother of mine tries to stop me, I will bring him here with you…"_

His mocking laughter echoed in her ears and made her skin crawl. She couldn't lose Richard. He was the only man who had ever loved her despite what she was. When everyone else fled from her in fright, Richard had fearlessly raced towards her. When no one else cared for her, he had dared to fall in love with her.

"Stay away from Richard or I swear I'll…" she spat out through clenched teeth, fuming with rage at the thought of Rahl harming her lover.

"_Or you'll what? Kill me? I'm already dead, Kahlan. Richard saw to that…and now I'm more powerful than you can possibly imagine. I'm coming for you, my love. Soon, we'll be together for all eternity…"_

"NO!!" Kahlan screamed, covering her ears with her hands, squeezing her eyes shut tightly against the voice and the echoing mock of his laughter. Tears began to pool in her eyes at the thought of losing her Richard. She loved him so much it made her heart race and her breathing labored. She never knew that love could ever make her feel like this; so all-consuming that it affected every part of her life.

"Kahlan!"

"No!!" she screamed again as she felt hands grabbing hold of her arms, trying to pull them down from holding her head.

"Kahlan, open your eyes!"

Opening her eyes, Kahlan found herself staring into the face of her Seeker, worry imprinted in his handsome face as he stared into her eyes. "Richard!" she cried as she threw herself into his comforting embrace.

Wrapping his strong arms around her, Richard pulled her securely to his chest. "Shhh, Kahlan…it's alright…I'm right here…it's alright, you're safe," he murmured into her hair as he held her against him, stroking her long dark hair.

As she trembled in his arms, Kahlan could feel tears beginning to roll down her cheeks, soaking his shirt. Unable to hold her fears in any longer, she released all the anguish that she had held in her heart the last few weeks.

"Kahlan, what happened? Please…talk to me," he softly pleaded with her.

"Richard, I heard Darken Rahl," she choked out as she pulled back to look into his eyes. She hated to tell him, knowing it would only further upset him, but she also knew she couldn't hide it from him.

"You heard Darken Rahl?" he repeated astonished, panic beginning to cloud his eyes.

"Yes…he…he was talking to me. He told me that I was going to be joining him soon and that he couldn't wait until I was his forever."

"Kahlan, I won't let anything happen to you, I promise," Richard vowed, his breathing becoming ragged with anger.

"Richard, he said he would take you too if you tried to stop him from getting to me," she murmured as she pressed her face into his chest once more, wanting to hide from all the horror and pain that Darken Rahl had stirred up inside her.

Richard closed his eyes as he leaned down and placed a comforting kiss to the top of Kahlan's head. "Hey, it'll be alright. We'll get through this together," he comforted her. "I've taken care of Rahl before and I'll do it again. I'm the Seeker, remember?"

"I don't think I can take much more of this…I can't bear the thought of losing you. I'm not strong enough, Richard," she fearfully admitted as she pulled back to look into the loving brown eyes that she adored. She was the Mother Confessor. She was supposed to be strong and fearless, the ruler and governing authority of the Midlands and yet here she was, crumbling under the weight of her fears.

"Kahlan, you're not going to lose me. I promise that there is nowhere that I would ever go that you aren't with me," Richard vowed as he pulled back to cup her face in his strong hands.

"That is one promise that I am going to make sure that you keep, Richard Cypher," she swore, his presence melting away all her fears as he wiped away her tears with his thumbs. "Hey, you're supposed to be sleeping. What are you doing up?" she suddenly realized.

"I couldn't sleep so I decided to look for you. I was worried about you keeping watch by yourself. That's when I heard you scream and found you here," he told her. "Besides, we haven't had a moment alone together in over two weeks," Richard mischievously admitted before leaning in to brush his lips against hers. "You have no idea how much I've missed you, Kahlan Amnell," he whispered against her mouth.

"I've missed you too," she breathily moaned into his mouth as he finally crushed his lips against hers.

Richard quickly moved his hands from her face to bury them in her luxurious hair, keeping her where she could not escape his kisses. Plunging his tongue into her mouth, Richard began to drink her in as he deepened their kiss.

Feeling his desperate need to be with her, Kahlan's own arousal began surging forcefully through her system. She had to have this man she loved more than her own life. It had been far too long since they had last made love and she was starving to taste him again.

As his tongue explored and caressed her mouth, Kahlan's hands began moving down his back, tugging his shirt free from his pants. Desperate to feel his hot flesh pressed against hers, she ran her hands under his shirt, raking her nails gently over the muscles of his back causing him to groan into her mouth.

"Kahlan," he breathed with passionate longing, pressing his hips against hers. "I need you now…I can't wait any longer to make love to you," he gasped as Kahlan grazed her teeth over his earlobe, taking it in her mouth and sucking on it, her hands still stroking the muscles of his back.

"Richard," Kahlan moaned. The feel of him pressing himself into her as well as vocalizing his frantic need to be in her were driving her insane with wanton desire for him. Rolling her hips against him, Richard spun her around and pressed her back against the nearest tree.

As he reached for the clasps of her jacket, a low rumbling sound resonated through the midnight air. Breathlessly, Richard pulled back, scanning the area for any sign of what could have caused the sound that had interrupted them.

"What is it?" Kahlan asked in between gasps for air, her eyes narrowed as she too began searching for the cause of the noise.

"I'm not sure," Richard mumbled, continuing to look as he listened intently for it again. It had almost sounded like thunder but there were only a few scattered clouds in the sky and no sign of rain.

After several moments of hearing nothing, Richard turned back towards Kahlan. "Now, where was I?" he seductively inquired with a smirk.

"I believe you left off right here," she teased as she ran her tongue across her lips before seizing his in a fiery kiss, eliciting a groan from the Seeker.

Another rumble suddenly vibrated through the air causing the ground to tremble beneath their feet. Pulling free from their passionate kiss, Richard turned, his eyes narrowed again as he waited silently. Kahlan moved from the tree to stand beside him, her hand on his arm in nervous anticipation of what was about to come. The air was unexpectedly still and silent, the only sound was that of their heavy breathing as they waited anxiously for the cause of the tremors.

Suddenly, the ground before them began to quake as it abruptly started pulling apart. Rocks and dirt fell into the expanding ravine that had rapidly opened up before them. Green glowing fire spurted out of the crack in the earth's crust as the rift continued to split and widen.

"Kahlan, run!" he worriedly yelled as the ground continued to rumble and quake, the split heading directly for them.

Kahlan took off in a dead run, turning back to see that Richard was right behind her. "Richard!" she screamed as she saw the rift suddenly split again and seemingly follow them in pursuit. It was as if the rift was alive, pursuing them like a hunter would its prey.

Loud mocking laughter began rising up from deep within the rift, permeating the air as it attempted to suffocate the life out of them. It was Darken Rahl. He had finally come for her.

Seeing the wide-eyed terror in his Confessor's eyes, Richard hollered, "Faster, Kahlan! Run!"

Kahlan ran as fast as she could, charging through brush and swatting at low limbs. Heat began to escape from the gaping rift behind them as the green glowing flames shot higher illuminating the sky and stifling the air, making it more difficult to breathe. Turning around as she ran, Kahlan could see the rift gaining on them, following closely at Richard's heels. She had to do something immediately or it would swallow Richard at any minute.

"Richard, you go that way and I'll go this way. It can't follow us both!"

"No! I'm not leaving you, Kahlan!" he growled in frustration.

"Richard, please! Just do it!" she shouted at him as her foot caught a tree root sticking up out of the ground, causing her to fall forward and hit the ground hard.

Richard stopped and quickly helped Kahlan to her feet. As he did, the ground began to crumble beneath him as the rift caught up to its prey. "Richard!" Kahlan screamed as she grabbed his hand, frantically pulling him with all her strength from the rift's deadly grasp.

Finally getting his feet on firmer ground, Richard began to race through the woods again as he kept a tight hold on Kahlan's hand. The ever expanding rift continued to cause the earth to rumble and quake as it split apart, Rahl's laughter erupting louder as it chased the Seeker and Confessor through the woods.

Trees, brush, and rocks were no match for the power that had erupted from the Underworld beneath, all falling into the rift. There was no place to hide from its vile attack on the earth or its deadly pursuit of the Mother Confessor.

Gripped with terror, Kahlan knew it was coming for her and for her alone. She had to do something to save Richard's life. As Richard made a hard right, Kahlan yanked her hand free from his grasp on her. Richard spun around at the sudden release of Kahlan's hand in his to see that she had stopped running.

Her bright blue eyes were set hard with resolve, cementing the decision that she had finally made. She would not let Darken Rahl or the Keeper get her Seeker. "I love you, Richard…more than you could ever possibly know," she said, her eyes wet with tears.

"Kahlan, no! Run! We can escape this!" Richard desperately shouted, anger mingling with panic at what he realized she was about to do.

"No, we can't Richard. It's me the Keeper wants. I will not let you die because of me," she stated as she closed her eyes, feeling the earth begin to crumble and give way under her feet.

"KAHLAN!"

She heard him scream her name, the terror and rage in his voice sending a shiver down her spine. "I love you forever…" she murmured as she waited for her life to end and her horror in the Underworld to begin.

Suddenly as if out of nowhere, she felt her body being slammed to the ground. Opening her eyes, she realized that Richard had raced towards her, throwing her out of the path of the rift just as it had opened under her feet. Dazed, she crawled to the edge of the rift. Peering down in horror, Kahlan found Richard hanging precariously to a rock a few feet below the edge of the fissure, green flames bursting up from below and licking at his boots.

"Richard, no!! Hang on!" she screamed as she lay down on the ground, stretching as far as she could and extending her hand for him to grasp.

"No, Kahlan! Stay back!" he shouted at her, his eyes filled with fear for her. "I love you, Kahlan, more than life," he proclaimed.

Staring at his lover for one last time, Richard's hand released his hold on the rock and fell into the waiting arms of the Keeper…

* Whoops! Now I took out the Seeker! I'm just sooo mean!! :)


	8. Chapter 8

Thanks for sticking with me everyone!

**Nightmares**** (Chapter 8)**

Lying on the ground with arm stretched out in desperation, Kahlan peered over the edge where Richard had just been. She stared horrified into deep abyss, shock overwhelming her soul, anguish breaking her heart.

"RICHARD!!" she screamed over and over until her voice became hoarse, tears coursing down her cheeks. This couldn't be happening. Her chest seized with agonizing sorrow, strangling the breath from her lungs, making it near impossible to breathe.

"No! Richard…please come back to me…" she cried, her voice rasping and weak. She felt as if all her strength and will to live had just been drained from her body. Richard had taken it and her heart with him into the Underworld.

Laughter suddenly rose up from the depths of the seemingly bottomless abyss. It swarmed around her, enveloping her and calling out to her, tormenting and mocking her pain and her grief.

"_Kahlan…there, there…it'll be alright…I'll be coming for you once I'm done with my brother…"_

"Bring Richard back to me now, Rahl!!" Kahlan seethed, her eyes flashing with rage and her all-consuming anguish. The painful depth of her loss was beyond anything she'd ever endured or imagined possible. She would do whatever it took now to make it stop.

"_I don't think so. I'm having a very nice reunion with my dear brother. I'm not sure he's having as good as time as I am, though…" _he chuckled, the sound of Richard's screams reverberating from the Underworld, shattering what was left of Kahlan's heart.

"Rahl, take me instead!! Let Richard live and I will take his place," she pleaded, her face soaked with her tears, her breath coming out in short gasps. Hearing Richard's tormenting screams were driving her to the brink of insanity. She felt so helpless to save him.

"_Oh, don't worry, my lovely Confessor…you'll be joining us soon enough. Right now, though, I'd like to prolong the agony of your separation for just a bit longer."_

"I will willingly stay by your side for all eternity in the Underworld if you let Richard go!!" she desperately begged as she bargained for Richard's life. It was her that the Keeper and Rahl wanted. Why wouldn't they just take her now and get it over with? Why did Richard have to suffer because of her?

"KAHLAN! NO!!" A familiar strangled cry suddenly escaped from the depths of the Underworld.

"RICHARD!!"

"_Goodbye for now, my love…but don't fret. I'll be coming for you soon enough once I'm finished enjoying my brother's company. Oh…and by the way, Richard sends his love…"_

An evil cackling laugher permeated the air again, echoing in her ears and crushing her soul. She had been frantically clinging to her last glimmer of hope when she had heard Rahl's voice, hoping that she could talk him into releasing Richard, but now that had just burned out.

"No, Richard!...I love you!" she mournfully cried, desperate for her lover to return to her. "Don't make me live my life without you…" she sobbed.

XXX

Kahlan lay on the ground, staring over the edge of the rift for what felt like hours. She couldn't bring herself to leave the last place her Richard had been. She somehow felt closer to him if she stayed there. Her overwhelming sorrow was choking the life out of her, teasing and tempting her with the thought of throwing herself over the edge of the rift and ending her torment. Then she could be reunited with her Seeker.

She couldn't bear the thought of having to go on without Richard. He was her source of strength, her sole purpose for living. He made the winding paths of her life seem straight, her future brighter than she had ever thought possible.

Ever since she was a little girl, Kahlan had thought that her life would lead to taking a mate, living a lonely existence in a loveless marriage in order to continue the line of Confessors. It was her duty as a Confessor and so she had resigned herself to her hopeless fate…that was until she had met Richard.

Richard had made her believe in true love, that there was someone in the world who had been created just for her. He had stirred up emotions in her that she had never known or thought possible. He had caused her to rethink beliefs that had been steeped in years of tradition and the ways of all the Confessors that had come before her. He had forced to face her feelings for him, to embrace it and not run away from it. He challenged her to look beyond the boundaries of her magic and at the infinite power and magic of their love.

Because of his relentlessness and pure love for her, they had been able to share their love with each other. But now, Richard was gone forever.

Slowing getting to her feet, Kahlan hung her head as she stared into the rift, mesmerized by the glowing green flames of the Underworld. "I'm so sorry, my love…" she softly whispered, her face stained with tears.

"Kahlan!"

Whirling abruptly on her heel, Kahlan turned to see Zedd and Cara rushing towards her, their eyes wide with fright as they took in the massive expanse of rifts that spread out like tentacles surrounding the area where Kahlan stood. The glowing green illumination lit up the horizon as the sun began to rise.

"Zedd!" she cried as she rushed into his arms, sorrow renewing its fierce grip on her soul and crushing the fragile damn she had built to hold back her tears.

Enveloping the Mother Confessor into his arms, Zedd held her to his chest. "Kahlan my dear, what happened?"

"He's gone, Zedd…he's gone…" she cried, hysteria attempting to overtake her again.

"Richard?" he asked incredulously, Cara coming to stand by his side.

"He sacrificed himself in order to save my life…" she woefully cried as she pulled back to look in the old Wizard's face. "What am I going to do without him?"

Tears formed in the Wizard's eyes at the thought of losing his only grandson. "Kahlan, he loved you above all else. He would want you to go on, to complete his quest, find the Stone of Tears, and seal the rift. He wouldn't want you to stop living because of him."

"I don't know if I can," Kahlan whispered as she looked up into Zedd's face. His eyes unexpectedly grew wide as he released his hold on her, his jaw growing slack as he stumbled backwards a couple of steps. "Zedd, what is it?" Kahlan asked, stunned.

Without a word, Zedd suddenly collapsed to the ground in a heap. Kahlan stood in horror as she took in the large gaping hole in his back that was still smoldering from the lethal magic that had been burned into him. "ZEDD!" Kahlan cried in shock.

Spinning around, Cara found them facing off against Sister Nicci and ten Sisters of the Dark. The Sisters' orange dresses and scarves billowed in the wind that had grown stronger with the opening of the rifts, their Dacras gripped tightly at their sides in preparation for battle.

Cara immediately flipped her agiels into her hands, ready to fight to the death. Even though her Lord Rahl was gone, she would never let him down by allowing the Mother Confessor to be harmed. Cara knew that he would expect her to protect Kahlan as if it were him.

Kahlan swiftly pulled her daggers, more than prepared to fight to the death no matter what. She would be the victor either way. If they killed her, she would be in the Underworld with Richard and could hopefully save him from Rahl. If Kahlan killed them, she could continue the quest and seal the rift. She knew that would be what Richard would have wanted her to do.

Her jaw clenched tight, Kahlan's eyes were like blue steel as she and Cara charged toward the waiting Sisters of the Dark. Dodging to the left, Kahlan narrowly missed being struck by a Dacra. Four Sisters raced towards the Mother Confessor and the Mord'Sith while Sister Nicci held the others back in anticipation.

Slicing and swinging their Dacras as if they were daggers, the approaching Sisters had split into pairs as they committed themselves in a battle to the death. Risking a glance to Cara on her left, Kahlan seethed, "for Richard."

"For Richard," Cara repeated the vow, the thirst for blood and revenge washing over the Mord'Sith's face.

Focusing her attention back to the battle, Kahlan threw herself into the fight with a vengeance, releasing all the fury and hurt that had swallowed her whole and now resided in her heart. Slicing her daggers, Kahlan blocked each Dacra as she ducked and stabbed, swiftly sending the two Sisters to their master in the Underworld.

Kahlan spun around to see how Cara was fairing when she saw Sister Nicci fire a Dacra straight at the Mord'Sith who was just about to finish off the second Sister of the Dark. "CARA!" Kahlan screamed, but it was too late.

The Dacra hit its target, embedding itself in the Mord'Sith's heart. Cara looked down at the Dacra and then up at the Mother Confessor. "I'm so sorry, Kahlan…I failed to protect you for Lord Rahl…"

"Cara, no!!" Kahlan cried as she ran toward her friend. She was brought to an abrupt halt by a burst of magical fire that stopped her dead in her tracks.

Sister Nicci sauntered her way up to the Mord'Sith. "I believe this belongs to me," she taunted as she looked Cara dead in the eye before ripping the Dacra out of her chest.

Kahlan could only stare in horror as Cara collapsed to the ground dead. "No…no, this can't be happening!" Kahlan muttered as she stared at the lifeless body of the Mord'Sith. This couldn't be real. She had not only lost Richard, but now Zedd and Cara also. Her world was crumbling down all around her. Within a matter of a few short hours, Kahlan had just lost everyone that she held dear.

"Well, who then will protect the great Mother Confessor now? Not so strong when you have lost your Seeker, Wizard, and Mord'Sith are you? And you're supposed to be the governing authority of the Midlands? You couldn't even protect your Seeker or your friends. How do you think that you can protect Aydindril?" Sister Nicci sneered, her eyes dancing with wicked glee.

Kahlan could only stare as she listened to the mocking words of Sister Nicci. She couldn't argue with Nicci; she was right in everything she said. She had let Richard down, had allowed him to die in his attempt to save her life. She had failed to protect her friends just now. How could she ever expect to rule the Midlands or protect Aydindril from the Keeper?

"No argument? No more fight? I expected so much more from the great Mother Confessor Kahlan Amnell. I guess all the rumors about you were wrong," Nicci smirked.

Tears began to stream down her cheeks as she felt her soul collapse under the weight of the Midlands and the world that had rested upon her shoulders as the Mother Confessor. She had let those under her protection down, but more than that she had let Richard down.

"I'm so sorry, my Richard," she murmured as she closed her eyes in anticipation of the painful death to come at the hands of Sister Nicci.

Suddenly, the ground began to quake again under her boots, the earth crumbling beneath her feet. Emerald fire began spurting up all around her as the ground ripped apart from the dark magic of the Underworld, tearing the boundary between the world of the living and the world of the walking dead. Kahlan abruptly felt the earth give way under her as she began to plummet to her death and into the waiting arms of Darken Rahl…

Walking through the woods listening to the owls hooting back and forth in their own private conversation, Kahlan silently walked the perimeter of their camp absorbed in her own thoughts. The moon was shining brightly as it peeked through the clouds that floated lazily before it while a gentle breeze cooled the warm summer air.

Even though Richard hated it when she was out here standing guard alone, Kahlan enjoyed taking her turn watching over the camp at night. She loved the moonlight that shone overhead, casting a yellowish glow on the earth below. The world was so calm, so peaceful at night. She could let her thoughts drift, reflect on the events of the day, work out her struggles. Her thoughts, however, always drifted back to where her heart forever beat; it always beat for Richard.

In the wee hours of the night before sunrise, there was no Keeper, no rift in the Underworld, no prophecies. All was right with the world. Besides that, she loved the fact that she was watching over her Seeker while he slept, keeping him safe from harm. She wanted to take care of him for the rest of her life.

Richard made her happy beyond her wildest dreams. The only thing that could possibly steal her happiness now was the Keeper and his followers. She couldn't control the shudder that vibrated through her body at the thought of the added danger she put her lover in.

"_As long as the Mother Confessor's pure heart beats, the Keeper is doomed to fail…"_

XXX

As the hours seemed to fly by, Richard's panic continued to grow to desperate levels. The longer they went with no sign of Kahlan, the worse his chances were of bringing her out of the nightmare. She had been breathing in the ayon now for longer than either Cara or he had.

Richard was panic-stricken about what Kahlan was going through right now. What kind of nightmare was she having? Was it intensifying? Was it starting to play out over and over again in her mind? As far as they knew, Richard and Cara's nightmares had only been lived through once in the two days they had been trapped in the mines. Zedd had told them, though, that the more times the nightmare repeated, the less likely they would be able to save her.

Richard cursed under his breath. In his nightmare, he had lived the experience of losing her once. He already knew deep down inside that he could never survive living through it a second time.

A sudden eruption jolted the Seeker from his thoughts as he looked overhead to see rocks beginning to break free from their resting place as another cave-in seized the mines. "Get back!" Richard frantically shouted at Zedd and Cara as he dove out of the way of falling rocks and debris.

Cara slammed into Zedd, knocking him out of the way of a large boulder falling just over his head. Hitting the ground hard, the wind was temporarily knocked out of them. Covering the Wizard with her body, Cara covered her head with her hands as rocks crashed down from above.

Cara tentatively looked up when the mine grew suddenly still. Looking around, Cara found the tunnel completely blocked and no sign of the Seeker…


	9. Chapter 9

Thanks for all the encouraging comments everyone! I really appreciate it. Only one more chapter after this I think. I will be off to do a sequel, though, so hang tight with me!!

**Nightmares**** (Chapter 9)**

Coughing, Richard slowly got up to his feet. The rag covering his face had thankfully helped deter the majority of the flying dirt. Turning to look behind him, he found himself standing alone on the other side of the rubble that now blocked the passageway. Richard knew these mines tunneled and snaked its ways all over underground and that there was more than one way out. He just hoped that Zedd and Cara were safe on the other side and not buried under the rubble.

Richard ran his hand through his hair, brushing the debris out of it and readjusting the rag. Turning, he began to make his way down the tunnel in his search for his Confessor. He had to find her before he lost her forever. He had tasted what it was like to lose her and it had been his worst nightmare. He vowed to himself that he would not live through that again.

As he quickly made his way, Richard cursed at the winding tunnels of the mine. They ran everywhere, some running deeper and deeper underground, others snaking this way and that. There were so many tunnels that just ended or led to small alcoves. He knew that he had to be getting closer to the end of the mines.

Having been lost in his thoughts, Richard stopped abruptly as he realized that he had just run past a small, narrower tunnel to his right. He didn't have a choice but to search every possible place Kahlan could have gone. He couldn't risk missing her; she was depending on him to save her and he couldn't let her down. He had felt what it was like to fail her in his nightmare and he never wanted to feel that heart-searing grief ever again.

Pushing aside the exhaustion that was threatening to overtake him, Richard slowly made his way down the narrow passage that was still dimly lit by a few flickering torches that lined it. His muscles ached, his head pounded, his mind still cloudy from the affects of the ayon. He had been running on nothing but sheer adrenaline and an unfathomable desperation to find his lover. She was the only thing that kept him on his feet.

All of a sudden, a soft cry reached the Seeker's ears and pricked his heart. It was his Kahlan. Richard took off in a dead run in the direction of the cry. As he drew closer, he became aware that Kahlan was weakly screaming his name.

Upon hearing his lover's cry, Richard felt a renewed sense of energy seize him. Finding strength that he thought he no longer had, Richard raced towards the end of the passageway that suddenly opened up into a large recess. Entering the alcove, Richard found Kahlan lying on the ground, her arm stretched out, her face holding a look of sheer terror. Her voice was becoming hoarse with her screams for him as tears rolled down her dirt streaked cheeks. The site of her in such despair broke his heart and shook him to his core. He didn't think he'd ever be able to shake the sound of her heart wrenching screams or the look of anguish on her face.

Cautiously, Richard made his way over to her and crouched down beside her. "Kahlan," he softly called, not wanting to startle her or jeopardize his chances of bringing her out of the nightmare.

So absorbed in the hallucination that kept replaying in her mind, Kahlan couldn't hear him over her paralyzing sorrow. Richard wanted so badly to pull her into his arms and take away her pain, but he was afraid to touch her for fear of what damage he may cause. At the same time, he also knew he couldn't let her continue like this. She had already breathed in too much ayon. There was no telling how much damage the ayon had already caused.

Swallowing hard, Richard knew he had to do something fast. "Kahlan!" he loudly called out to her.

There was still no response from his Confessor who continued to hoarsely cry out his name. Tears began to form in his eyes seeing the exhaustion that lined her face, her breathing so erratic, her outstretched hand clawing repeatedly at the ground causing her fingers to bleed. He was rapidly losing her to the nightmare that possessed her.

"Kahlan! Listen to me! It's Richard. I'm right here; it's alright now," he began to soothe as he gently grasped her arms and pulled her up to sit.

Feeling hands on her arms, Kahlan began to fight, swinging violently with her fists, pounding them wildly into Richard's chest in an attempt to evade her presumed attacker. "NO!!" she choked out.

"Kahlan, it's me! It's Richard! I love you Kahlan…come back to me!" he cried, tears escaping his eyes as he grabbed hold of his lover's wrists to keep her from hitting him. It broke his heart to see her fighting him even though he knew that she couldn't help it.

"NO!!" she continued to cry, her voice being reduced now to barely a whisper. Her eyes flew open as she struggled against the hold on her wrists. She saw Richard, but did not recognize him, her mind still clouded with the effects of the fumes. She just knew that she couldn't give up; she couldn't fail Richard again. She had to fight.

Finally breaking free from the grip on her wrists, Kahlan quickly shuffled backwards, pressing herself tightly up against the rock wall. "Stay back whoever you are," she whispered, her eyes wide with terror. She didn't know who he was or what he wanted; all she did know was that he had grabbed her and Richard was dead.

"Kahlan, it's Richard," he gently began as he slowly stood to his feet, hands raised open in front of him in an attempt to reassure her that he meant her no harm. She thankfully seemed to be awake and out of the nightmare. Now, he just had to get her to remember who he was, remember what they meant to each other.

"Richard's dead!" she softly wailed, tears flooding her face. "I lost him forever…he died because of me…" She tilted her head back and pressed her eyes closed against the wash of memories of watching him die in her place.

"KAHLAN!! Listen, I'm not dead! I'm right here!" he desperately exclaimed as he finally rushed towards her. Pulling the rag off and kneeling down before her, Richard grabbed her wrists, placing her hands on his face for her to touch him, to feel that he was real. He was alive and standing right there in front of her. He had to make her see him; he had come just for her and he was not about to leave without his Kahlan.

As one hand began drawing down his cheek and along his jaw line, Kahlan's other hand grazed over his cheekbone and down to his lips. Running her fingers over his lips, she could feel his warm breath brush softly against her skin, sending a tingle down her spine.

The feel of her finger stroking over his lips caused a soft moan to escape Richard's mouth. He was so frantic to get her back, so relieved to have finally found her. It took every bit of resolve he possessed not to pull her to him and take her lips in a fiery passionate kiss.

Hearing the soft response to the feel of her hands on his face, Kahlan's mind slowly began to clear a little from the all-consuming nightmarish fog that possessed it. The feel of his face that she touched was so familiar as were the lips that began to move under her fingertips.

"I love you Kahlan with all my heart," he murmured as he pulled one of her hands and placed it over his heart, holding it against his chest, anxious for her to feel his beating heart and to know that he was not dead.

Feeling the wild beating of his heart, Kahlan suddenly knew this was the man she loved above all else; this was her lover, her Richard…and he was alive.

XXX

"I hope Lord Rahl wasn't buried under that avalanche of rock," Cara muttered again as they continued to make their way back through the winding tunnels, a scowl fixed on her face. She was not happy about having to abandon him.

"I told you, Cara. I used my magic to check the rubble and he was not underneath it. He must have been trapped on the other side of the rocks," Zedd explained again, growing exasperated with the Mord'Sith's lack of belief in him.

"I know what you said, but I won't believe it until I see him for myself!" she growled, frustrated with this turn of events. She was Lord Rahl's protector. How was she supposed to protect him if she couldn't even find him?

"Still rattled from the nightmare?" Zedd guessed as he cast a sidelong glance at his leather-clad companion.

"It was so real…I swear I really lived through those events," she softly replied, her eyes growing distant with the painful memory.

"You'll feel better in few days after some rest," he reassured her, placing his hand on her shoulder, letting her know without words that he was there if she needed someone to talk to.

Cara looked over at his hand on her shoulder before looking up into the old Wizard's face. Seeing the comforting look of friendship reflecting in his eyes, Cara felt an overwhelming sense of peace flood her soul. "Thank you, Zedd," she murmured.

"_Damn Lord Rahl for bringing out these useless emotions in me,"_ she swore to herself. He had made her feel vulnerable with these new found emotions. She was still unsure how she felt about it. This was definitely going to take some getting used to, but she readily decided it was an obstacle she preferred to overcome compared to returning to her former life.

XXX

"Richard!" she weakly cried, still confused and stunned to see Richard standing before her alive and well. Grasping his face with both of her hands, Kahlan could only stare in amazement as her tears continued to fall.

"Yes, Kahlan, it's really me," he told her as he cupped her face, caressing her dirt streaked cheeks with his thumbs.

"I saw you…you…die…" she rasped in bewilderment, afraid to believe that what she was seeing was actually real. Her mind was a whirlwind of emotions and memories, nightmare mingling with reality, fears warring with logic. Nothing made sense to her any more.

"It wasn't real. None of it was real. This, Kahlan…this is real…" he heatedly declared as he pressed his lips to hers, taking them in a tender kiss.

Feeling his lips lovingly caress hers, Kahlan felt her heart filling with love, replacing the heart-wrenching sorrow that had previously consumed it. Her Richard was hers again. She felt such happiness, but was still bewildered about what had happened to her. She was having a difficult time focusing and thinking straight.

Richard breathlessly pulled away, pressing his forehead to hers as he pulled her to stand with him. "Kahlan, I'm so relieved I finally found you. I thought I had lost you forever too," he murmured. Pulling a rag from his pocket, Richard leaned around Kahlan's head, fastening the cloth securely over her face. "Here you need to cover your nose and mouth. The mines are laced with ayon. It's what caused the nightmares and hallucinations."

"It was all so real. I watched you die, Richard," she hoarsely whispered as she shivered. She felt so weak, lightheaded and so cold. The cave was beginning to spin again, her vision narrowing to pinpoints of blackness as her legs began to collapse under her.

Grabbing her by her arms, Richard caught Kahlan before she hit the ground. Lowering her to the mine floor, Richard's panic returned as he noticed how pale she had became. "Kahlan?" he exclaimed, as he brushed her hair from her face.

Kahlan attempted to open her eyes, tried to respond to Richard calling her name, but she couldn't open her eyes or make her mouth work. She felt as if she was paralyzed somehow as exhaustion swept through her body and claimed her consciousness.

Failing to get a response from his Confessor, Richard gathered her up in his arms. He had been so relieved to have found her at last, had thought he had saved her in time, but now he was on the verge of losing his heart all over again. He had to get her out of here as soon as possible.

With Kahlan safely in his arms, Richard began the long trek through the mining tunnels and hopefully to the world outside. The sooner he got Kahlan to safety, the sooner they could continue their mission, find the Stone of Tears, seal the rift, and then they could finally be married.

The thought of marrying his Confessor brought a smile to his lips as he tilted his head, stroking the top of Kahlan's head with his cheek. "It's going to be alright, Kahlan. I'm going to take care of you now and forever," he murmured into her hair as he rushed through the tunnel.

Richard's body was starting to shut down from the constant stress he had placed upon it, the unrelenting pace he had kept for the last several hours of searching for Kahlan and Cara. He had now had only a little water and no food for three days. The affects of the ayon would continue to linger until he had fully rested. He knew he couldn't stop though; not until Kahlan was safely out of these mines and away from the ayon fumes that continued to build with every collapse that erupted.

As he continued to push himself further, his unconscious Confessor in his arms, Richard felt his strength waning. _"Please dear Spirits! Help me find a way out of here; help me save Kahlan!"_ he silently begged.

Turning down another passageway, Richard spotted a flicker of light, different from the eternally burning torches that lined the tunnels of the mine. He quickly attempted to make his way for the light, his body rapidly giving out under the stress of the demands he had been putting upon it. His head was pounding, his muscles aching and fatigued, his vision blurring.

Richard stumbled against the mine wall as his vision shifted in and out of focus. His breathing was labored as his heart raced. Summoning every last bit of strength he had, Richard righted himself as he adjusted Kahlan's weight in his arms. Kahlan's breathing had become very slow, at times terrifying with the thought that he had lost her.

Stumbling again, Richard fell forward, losing his grip on his Confessor as she fell to the ground. Panting to regain his breath, Richard attempted to push himself up on all fours only to have his limbs collapse under him, unable to hold him up any longer.

The distant light at the end of the tunnel was shining brightly now. He was so close. Just a few hundred feet and they would have made it. Slowly, Richard extended his arm, taking Kahlan's hand in his. Grasping it tightly, Richard sadly murmured as unconsciousness's inky void blanketed his mind, "I love you my beautiful Kahlan…I'm so sorry…I failed you again…"

*Man, you guys are right! I am mean with these gut-wrenching cliffhangers! I have myself choked up and I'm the one writing it! :(


	10. Chapter 10

You guys are the best! Thanks so much for following along with me and all the encouraging reviews! Here's the last chapter. I'm off to work on the sequel…

**Nightmares**** (Chapter 10)**

The tall grasses of the meadow swayed gently in the wind like rolling green waves. The sun burned brightly above, warming everything within its reach. It was the perfect day to say the least.

Lying in the grass watching the billowing white clouds drift lazily overhead, Richard didn't think he could be any happier or more content then he was at that moment. He was the luckiest man in all three territories.

Richard knew he was grinning, but he couldn't help it. Kahlan had put the smile on his face; her name forever written upon his heart just as his name was on hers. They had survived another trial, had been unwilling participants pulled into the familiar dance with death once again and had lived through it to fight another day.

Squeezing the woman sleeping beside him tighter to his bare chest, Richard fought against the sudden rush of terror that endeavored to well up inside of him threatening to ruin their beautiful afternoon of love making. He had come so close to losing her again. The sooner he found the Stone of Tears and sealed the rift, the sooner Kahlan would be safe from Darken Rahl, the Keeper, and the prophecies that haunted their lives.

The feel of lips beginning to move against his sun-kissed flesh caused Richard to moan with his rapidly escalating arousal, his smile growing wider with anticipation knowing that his lover was awake. Eager to explore every inch of each other all over again, Richard quickly rolled on top of her, eliciting a giggling squeal of pleasure.

He loved the feel of her soft flesh pressed so closely and completely against his, the feel of her feminine curves…

"_Lord Rahl,"_

…her luxurious long dark hair, the taste of her sweet lips before he plunged his tongue into her mouth to savor her fully…

"_Lord Rahl,"_

…caressing her breasts, his hands running down her sides, stroking her smooth stomach on his way down to her…

"_LORD RAHL!!"_

Richard's eyes flew open at the sound of the distasteful title he had refused to claim. Seeing Cara staring down at him, Richard quickly sat up, his chest heaving, his body pulsating with heated arousal.

"Glad to see you finally decided to wake up. Judging by the sounds you were making, it must have been a very good dream," Cara smirked with an arched eyebrow conveying that she knew full well what he'd been dreaming about.

Looking away with a blush, Richard apprehensively scanned the room he now found himself in. "Cara, what happened? Where's Kahlan?" he anxiously asked.

"She's in the next room," the Mord'Sith began as she attempted to push him back into bed. "You need to rest. Zedd told me not to let you get up until he saw you."

Ignoring his determined protector's warning, Richard swung his legs over the edge of the bed. He had to see Kahlan; he had to know that she was alright. He didn't want to be separated from her any longer than he already had been.

"Lord Rahl!"

"Cara, I'm fine. I have to see Kahlan."

"You know I could take you out with my agiels and make you listen to me," she reminded him, crossing her arms over her chest.

"I know, but you won't," he called over his shoulder as he headed for the door.

"You are the most obstinate…" she growled under her breath as she strode across the room to catch up with him.

"How long have I been out?" ignoring her cursing complaint.

"Two days. Zedd and I made it out of the mines after the cave-in and then circled around to check the other entrances. We finally found you both a few hundred feet from the mine entrance," she informed him as he reached the door to Kahlan's room.

"Has she woken at all?" he asked, concern in his voice. Things were still hazy, but he definitely remembered how bad she looked when he had carried her through the mining tunnels.

"No, not yet," Cara softly responded as Richard turned the handle and pushed the door open.

His chest tightening, Richard stood frozen in the doorway as he stared at the site of his Confessor lying in a bed, her face ashen. She looked worse since the last time he had seen her. "Cara," he gasped, his brow furrowed with worry, "is she going to be alright?"

"Zedd said he didn't know; we have to wait until she wakes to see," Cara murmured, concern also evident in her face. She would never willingly admit it, but she considered the Mother Confessor her friend. It also hurt her to see the Lord Rahl in such despair.

Finally finding the strength to make his legs work, Richard slowly made his way to Kahlan's bed. Cara stood in the doorway for a moment before turning and closing the door behind her to leave him alone with his love.

As he approached the bed, Richard found his eyes watering with tears as he stared into Kahlan's pale face. Kneeling down at the edge of the bed, Richard reached under the blanket and pulled her arm free from the covers. Clutching her hand tightly in his, he brought it to his lips. Brushing her fingers with a soft kiss, Richard used his other hand to brush back a stray strand of hair. She felt so cold to his touch.

Stroking her hair, Richard leaned in and pressed his lips to her forehead. The chill of her skin made his blood run cold with fear. "Kahlan, please come back to me," he whispered. "We're been through too much together to leave me now."

Slipping off his boots, Richard pulled back the covers and crawled into bed behind his Confessor. He gently pulled her into his arms, wrapping his body around hers in hopes of warming her. His heart was so heavy with anguish; he wanted nothing more than to see her electric blue eyes staring lovingly at him again. "I'm right here, Kahlan; I'll never leave you," he murmured into her hair as he drifted off to sleep, hoping that when he woke up, his earlier dream in the meadow would be a reality.

XXX

Zedd slowly opened the door to the room to find Richard sleeping, holding Kahlan in his arms. He had been so relieved when they had found them in that tunnel a couple of days ago. He had feared that they had lost them forever.

The old Wizard made his way over to the bed. Zedd settled down in a wooden chair beside his loved ones' bed. Richard began to stir upon hearing someone enter the room.

Lifting his head, Richard saw Zedd sitting by the bed watching over them. "Zedd…how long have I been asleep."

"A few hours," he quietly informed him. "You don't listen to Cara very well, my boy," he teased his grandson, a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth.

"I had to see Kahlan; I couldn't be away from her any longer."

"I know; I just wanted to warn you about her condition before you saw her," Zedd replied. He was worried about how Richard would respond to seeing Kahlan. She had been near death when they found her and Richard hadn't been that far behind her. Zedd had done what he could, but even a Wizard of the First Order could only do so much against the dangerous effects of ayon. Now, it was up to Kahlan.

"Zedd, please tell me the truth. Is she going to live?"

"I honestly don't know. Kahlan is strong, she's a fighter. We just need to give her some time."

Unable to find his voice, Richard could only nod his head in understanding. Lying back down, Richard pulled Kahlan closer into his arms. He never wanted to let go of her ever again.

"Richard, why don't you go get cleaned up and get something to eat. You haven't eaten anything in days. You need to get your strength up. You weren't in that great of shape yourself when we found you too, you know. Cara or I can sit here with Kahlan."

"I just want to lay here with her for a little while longer. Then, I'll go downstairs and get something to eat," he softly replied, closing his eyes against the wash of heated tears. He hated the thought of letting go of her, of leaving her here alone without him. He was afraid if he walked out of the room, she wouldn't be there when he came back.

Slowly standing to his feet, Zedd replied, "Alright my boy, but if you're not downstairs eating something in the next half hour, I'm sending Cara after you."

Smiling to himself, Richard answered, "I promise. Thank you, Zedd."

XXX

Several hours had gone by and still Kahlan had not wakened. With every passing hour, Richard spiraled deeper into despair. He had finally relented to go downstairs and eat when Cara showed up in the room, agiels in hand. He had pushed her once; he knew he wouldn't get away with it too many more times. He was too distraught and too exhausted to fight her this time.

Reluctantly releasing his hold on Kahlan, Richard had pressed a kiss to her cheek before following Cara out of the room. Having eaten something, Richard did admit he felt somewhat better. He hadn't eaten as much as Zedd had insisted he eat, but then again, no one had an appetite like his grandfather.

Re-entering the room, Richard made his way to Kahlan's bed again. Kneeling down beside her, he took her hand, closed his eyes and pressed it to his lips as he gave up a silent prayer to the Spirits on her behalf.

"You need a bath."

At the sound of her voice, Richard's eyes flew open. "What?" he incredulously asked, afraid to believe the voice he had just heard.

Turning her head towards him, Kahlan opened her eyes, giving him the smile that made his heart melt and his stomach flutter. "You need a bath, Cypher," she weakly repeated, her voice still somewhat hoarse.

Tears of joy and relief began falling from his eyes as he swiftly scooped his soul-mate up into his arms. "Kahlan, you sacred the life out of me!" he exclaimed as he sat on the edge of her bed, holding her in his arms.

Wrapping her arms around him, she held him tightly to her, knowing the anguish he held in his heart. She had felt the same in her nightmare. Her memory of the last several days was nothing but pieces that didn't seem to fit together. She knew Richard would explain everything to her later. Right now, she was content just to hold and comfort her Seeker, to just be with the man that she loved.

XXX

Richard stayed by her side the next three days, nursing his Confessor back to health. She had made great progress much to Richard's relief and delight. It had taken a lot of arguing to keep the Mother Confessor in bed resting. Zedd felt it would be safe for her to travel again in the next day or so.

Walking back to their room at the inn in nothing but his pants and boots, Richard ran his towel over his wet hair one last time before flinging it over his bare shoulder. He had been so relieved the nightmare of the last several days was finally over. Kahlan was safe and they could resume their search for the Stone in the next day or so.

Opening the door to their bedroom, Richard came to an abrupt halt in the doorway as his breath hitched. Kahlan was standing, staring out the window dressed only in a white satin nightdress. Turning at the sound of him entering the room, her dark raven hair fell over her shoulders and came to rest at the tops of her breasts. The nightdress was edged in lace along the top of the bodice that dipped low between her breasts, revealing a tempting amount of soft flesh. The lace hem hit above the ankle and the slit up the side revealed a generous portion of her thigh as she moved away from the window.

Standing with the moonlight splashing through the curtains, Kahlan looked all the more angelic and beautiful to behold. "Are you going to stand there all night gawking or are you going to lock the door?" she seductively inquired, her eyes dancing with longing.

Finally finding his breath again, Richard turned and quickly bolted the door shut. No one was getting in tonight and neither of them planned on leaving any time soon. Kicking his boots off, Richard threw his towel to the floor before making his way to where Kahlan stood.

Brown eyes locked on blue as he approached her, his senses beginning to spiral out of control with passion and the desperate need to reconnect with his lover once more. The last few days had been tormenting to say the least. They both needed the comfort and loving reassurance of their soul-mate's touch.

"This is new," he murmured with fiery desire smoldering in his eyes, pleased with the new attire he found on his lover as he ran his fingers over her soft bare shoulder to the thin lace strap and then under it as his hand caressed the side of her breast.

Her breathing already becoming ragged with need, Kahlan smiled as she replied, "I picked it up a while back as a surprise for you. Do you like it?"

"No…I love it…but more than that, I love the one wearing it," he softly said as he leaned in and brushed his lips against hers.

The grazing caress of his lips against hers sent arousing shocks of electricity firing rapidly throughout her body. She had missed being with him and feeling him so much it almost hurt. She swiftly buried her hands in his wet hair, wrapping her fingers around the longer strands as the tenderness of their kiss rapidly began to escalate into heated need.

Thrusting his tongue into her mouth, he began devouring her as the need to reconnect intensified with the deep-seated hunger for her that demanded to be satisfied. His hands moved from her sides to hold her head as he swiftly pushed her back up against the wall behind her.

Colliding into the wall, Kahlan's own desire burst into flames that threatened to consume her if she didn't do something about it. Her hands left his hair and began running feverishly over his back, her nails gently raking across his muscles.

Richard moaned into her mouth when her hands began running along the edge of his pants and around to the laces. She made quick work of the laces as she began pushing his pants off of his hips. She had to put a temporary hold on her task as Richard began to nip, kiss, and lick his way down her neck to her breasts causing her to tilt her head back. She relished the feel of his lips devouring her skin.

Grabbing hold of her thighs, Richard pulled her up onto him. Kahlan used her feet to push his pants off before wrapping her legs around his waist. The feel of her legs wrapped tightly around him made his head spin. He had to be in her soon before he went mad from his all-consuming desire for her.

Turning her away from the wall, Richard carried his lover to their bed. Laying her down, Richard climbed over her as he began to make fierce passionate love to the one he thought he had lost forever. Kahlan could not get enough of him. Every touch, every stroke, every ounce of love he poured into her, Kahlan greedily welcomed and showed in return. The feel of their bodies moving in perfect rhythm swiftly pushed them over the edge and into the waiting arms of temporary sated bliss.

As they lay in each other's arms trembling from their passionate release, Kahlan could not hold back the sudden onslaught of tears. Feeling her tears on his chest, Richard quickly sat up, taking Kahlan's face in his hands.

"Kahlan, what's wrong? Are you alright?" he anxiously asked, his breathing still labored as concern weighed heavily in his warm brown eyes. He prayed that he hadn't hurt her. He just couldn't hold himself back any longer. The need to be complete in her and with her had driven his body to heights of passion never reached before.

"I'm fine, Richard…better than fine…" she replied as tears trickled slowly down her cheeks. "I just can't shake the images from that nightmare from my mind. I know you told me that it was only a nightmare, but it was so real, the pain I felt was real. I saw you die, Richard. I can't live through losing you like that again. I'm not strong enough."

Pulling her to him, Richard stroked her long hair. "Kahlan, I'm right here. I'm not going to leave you. The Keeper, Darken Rahl, the prophecy, the Stone of Tears…forget all of it. Right now, there is only you and me. As long as we have each other, we can make it through anything," he pulled back to wipe her tears. "We'll just have to make more good memories to drive away the bad ones."

"I like that idea," she smiled shyly through the last of her tears.

Lying back, Richard pulled Kahlan down to lay against his chest again. As he softly caressed her back, Richard could feel her begin to relax in his embrace. "I won't let anything happen to you, I promise. I love you Kahlan, with all that I am."

"I love you too, Richard, forever," she murmured as she closed her eyes.

"Tomorrow I'd like to show you this meadow I heard about from the inn keeper," he told her with a grin spreading across his handsome features.

"I'd like that," she replied, knowing he had ulterior motives. "I'll bring a blanket along in case we need to stop and rest."

"Oh, there is not going to be any rest involved with what I have in mind for you," he teased as he rolled over on top of her, brushing his nose against hers.

As Richard and Kahlan began to make love again, they both knew that the nightmares that they had experienced had been pulled from their deepest, darkest fears. They had decided that their love for each other and their dream of a future together were both stronger than their worst nightmares could ever be.

**THE END **…for now… :)


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